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Monday, August 15, 2011

Dancing with the prophet of polygamy

 I have found myself in numerous unusual situations over the years (oops, I did it again), but one of the most memorable was the time I spent in the arms of Rulon C. Allred, the prophet and spiritual leader of an estimated 10,000 Mormon polygamists in the U.S. and Mexico.
No, we were not in the throes of “replenishing the Earth,” as Dr. Allred, a homeopathic physician, regularly reminded his flock to do “with vigor, pleasure and the love of God.”
We were dancing.
Although I hadn’t done any ballroom dancing since being forced to do so in elementary school, Dr. Allred and I twirled, trotted, soared and swooped around the dance floor with the greatest of ease. All around us, watching good-naturedly, were hundreds of his followers.
When I had first called Dr. Allred at his Murray office asking to interview him for an article, he icily refused to “cast pearls before swine.” Later that night, he called me back and said God had told him that I had a good heart and that I would do his people no harm. He scheduled an interview with me the next day and invited me to a dance that evening.
I had expected to be a very unobtrusive spectator at this gathering — just here to get some “color commentary” — so when Dr. Allred welcomed everyone, and introduced me, and then said he and I would kick off the evening by dancing together, I was mortified. I am not a dancer — at least not when I’m sober!
I had read that all a woman needs to do in this situation is to submit completely and unquestioningly to her competent partner (sounds like a basic Mormon precept!), and he can maneuver her body into graceful and even complex, rather flashy dance moves that she never dreamed she could achieve.
It worked! All I’d had to do was to go limp and trust in the prophet. He had taken care of the rest. He was a master at getting a female body to do whatever needed to be done, while remaining a perfect gentleman (that sounds like another basic precept).
Because of his slenderness and height, and his benign, bemused expression, Dr. Allred reminded me of Arthur Murray, whose television program appeared from 1950-60. The lanky Arthur and his wife Katharine were among the most beloved personalities of the era. They made dancing look as refreshing as a mouthwash commercial — all tingly and energizing. The satin swooshed, their heads turned to and fro, and their facial expressions reflected effortless pleasure.
I spent many hours with Dr. Allred, his charming wives and several couples in his flock. I attended a service, which wasn’t the slightest bit bizarre, at his Bluffdale church.
Then, I went back to New York to write my article about him, and just as it was about to go to press in May 1977, he was assassinated by members of a rival polygamous sect, led by Ervil LeBaron. He was only 71, and left behind at least seven wives and 48 children.
I am writing this primarily as a counterweight to the horrendous portrait of the polygamous lifestyle that was presented at the trial of FLDS leader Warren Jeffs. I am nowhere near an expert on plural marriage, but I do believe that what I saw during my time with the Allred group was a fairly credible representation of how “The Principle” is lived among his followers.
Dr. Allred was a complex man. His moral certitude could make him seem cold and condescending. But he was no pervert, and I don’t believe he would tolerate anything even resembling child abuse or spousal abuse among his people.
I was honored to meet his wives, who ranged in age, I would estimate, from mid-30s to mid-70s. They were very sweet and relaxed. They looked like “regular people” — not dressed in the old-fashioned pioneer getups we often see on TV. They behaved like “regular people” as well — chattering, laughing, teasing and reminiscing among themselves.
They and the other polygamous families I met discussed the pros and cons of their lifestyle candidly.
It would not be prudent to generalize about polygamy from my glimpse at the Allred flock. Rulon and his brother, Owen, who succeeded him, were regarded as moderate and open, relative to other polygamous sects.
But I feel compelled to support the Apostolic United Brethren, often known as The Allred Group, in its statement last week condemning abuses in the Jeffs group and denying that it is involved in these depraved and criminal activities.
I trust that, for the most part, they are good people, attempting to live in a very challenging way because they believe it is God’s will.
Sylvia Kronstadt, a semi-retired writer and editor, blogs at kronstantinople.blogspot.com.

10 comments:

  1. We all can like others not of our religion. It is an everyday thing. It seems the author felt the need to speak out since she met what seemed to be a nice man, not like Warren Jeffs.
    Although to her, it was ok he had twin wives in their 30's and he was 71? Married them when they were 15 and he in his 50's. Isn't that a little Warren Jeffish?

    I get her point. We like all walks of life. In fact, the lord wants us to, how else can we spread the word if we are not friendly with those that need to hear it?

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  2. So she liked him.

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  3. You don't have to be the same religion to like someone, that's silly.

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  4. An interesting glimpse into a moment with a well known figure in polygamy. I know the article is meant to be cute and humorous and an honest view point of her experience with the charismatic Rulon, but I think it was poor timing and some of the wording seems insensitive to the FLDS victims in light of the Jeffs' tapes and trial.


    "It worked! All I’d had to do was to go limp and trust in the prophet. He had taken care of the rest. He was a master at getting a female body to do whatever needed to be done, while remaining a perfect gentleman (that sounds like another basic precept)."


    "But I feel compelled to support the Apostolic United Brethren, often known as The Allred Group, in its statement last week condemning abuses in the Jeffs group and denying that it is involved in these depraved and criminal activities."





    Mostly, the article reads like a promo for the AUB.

    The second paragraph I pasted makes it a wrap imo.

    She feels compelled to support a group some 30 odd years later based on Rulon when the man is no longer alive and participating without noting current information.

    "I had read that all a woman needs to do in this situation is to submit completely and unquestioningly to her competent partner (sounds like a basic Mormon precept!)"

    And she did!

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  5. Anonymous, you always say what I can't put into words. Disgusting.
    I thought "gross" when I read it. See why I'm not the writer but the computer gal around here! LOL

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  6. The whole thing gave me shivers... she actually talking like he was seducing her, and her liking it. Once again, there's that word...CREEPY

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  7. Delightful story - only trouble is, Rulon Allred "married" two fifteen year old Jessop girls. In addition several high position (Priesthood Council) members were sexual molesters. These were Gustavo Palaccios (known as Shevroll Palaccios) Joseph B Thompson, and George Maycock. Palaccios was actually turned in to the law (by teachers at his daughters school, not by AUB leaders) was sent to prison, as was his wife who "assisted' in the molestation of his daughters. There is a high incidence of sex crime in AUB - can't say statistically whether it was higher than elsewhere as don't have the exact figures. This is not to say that all polygamists are abusers, but the possibilities for abuse are greater. The problem is that it allows a molester with several 'wives' and a large amount of children, greater scope for his perversions, and the sad likelihood that some of the molested children will go on to do the same thing when they 'marry' polgamously. Another unpleasant fact is that AUB is part of a coalition of polygamists that includes the infamous Kingstons who are violent and practice incest. Makes AUBs protestations sound hollow.

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  8. Freeandclear you knocked it out of the ball park!!!


    PS
    ::hugs mistersister:: You make me smile and laugh all the time and bringing emotion is a true sign of a great writer! You can do both and we luv ya for it!

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  9. I grew up on The Ranch in Montana which was an outpost of the AUB. I always felt very comfortable with Uncle Rulon as I knew him. However, as a little girl there were other men in the community that I insinctively knew were not safe to be around. After Rulon's murder the dark and sinister side of many men became more prevalant. I was not surprised years later to learn of the men who were molesting their daughters and teaching them to do the same to their children. Remember that these girls are told that their fathers and husbands are their leaders and as such it is a mans responsibility to teach women what to do with their bodies. That I do remember all too well as a victim of these abuses myself.

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  10. Oh, how horrible. You, too? I am so sorry. Why do you think, in a society where men have plenty of women, this happens? I would love to hear your theory, even write a post, if you felt like sharing. Anon. of course.
    How sad.

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