In 2011, the Sister Wives Blog started out as a place to talk about the TLC reality show "Sister Wives", Kody Brown and his wives Christine, Robyn, Meri and Janelle. Today we not only discuss the show, we discuss Polygamy in our society, and the public perceptions of the Mormon Religion. We discuss "Polygamy USA" and will be covering "My 5 Wives."
This blog is geared towards the adult reader, so please, no one under the age of 18 years. Thank you!
When we left off, we were discussing the Brown family and hypocrisy. The religion of Islam and Islamic scholars say that God categorizes hypocrisy into 2 groups, hypocrisy of belief and hypocrisy of action. We discussed hypocrisy of belief in Part 1.
The second type of hypocrisy, according to Islam, is hypocrisy of action.
The hypocrite's crime is that he bears false witness against himself.
Hannah Arendt, On Revolution, 1963
Hypocrisy of action includes:
b.breaking promises made,
c.betraying trust, ,and
d. being imprudent and insulting during disagreements.
Lying. Yes, I know that the majority of us tell “little white lies” to preserve the feelings of family and friends. Do you really want to tell your colleague that she dresses like a color-blind bag lady who got dressed in the dark this morning? No, I am not talking about those kind of “fibs”, as my mother called them. I am talking about when parents tell their children that they can choose their religion and then, when the children try to exercise that choice the parents do an about-face and say that the kids can make the choice “when their frontal lobes are fully developed.” Or when parents tell their children that they can express their opinions calmly and respectfully and, again, when the children attempt to do just that, the parents have a hissy fit pout and shut down the discussion with autocratic pronouncements – or do the same thing to their spouses. I don’t know for sure what “fibs” the authorities may or may not have been told during bankruptcy or food stamp applications, but I have my personal opinions.
Interestingly, these Islamic scholars say that lying is ALWAYS part of hypocrisy because hypocrites cheat people with words to get what they want, caring only for their own self-interest and lacking an appropriate sense of shame for the things that they have done wrong (they have done wrong and don’t care). Hmmmmm.
One of the things I find interesting is that the wives say they are happy and the marriages are good, when their body language, tone of voice and facial expressions say something else. If you turn the volume off when they are speaking they look sad, anxious and sometimes even frightened. Some people might consider this a form of lying and hypocrisy.
Any of you who have read Dr. Zhivago will remember that Yurii said, “Yourhealth is bound to be affected if, day after day, you say the opposite of what you feel, if you grovel before what you dislike... Our nervous system isn't just fiction, it's part of our physical body, and it can't be forever violated with impunity."
Some of the examples of lying above also count as breaking promisesmade. When you promise your teenager (or spouse) that you will treat them as a person, and then turn around and treat them as chattel, that smacks of hypocrisy. And didn't Robyn say that she wanted to fit in? Didn't she sort of promise to do that? I don't really see that playing out other than her promise to create more children.
I have seen numerous examples of Kody talking about one wife to another wife about a private matter and I thought I saw Robyn doing the same thing a couple of times (monkey see, monkey do). To me that is betraying trust. I think that the only way plural marriage can work is when each separate marriage relationship is kept private. Apparently Kody disagrees with me. I also feel that both Kody and Janelle have betrayed Hunter’s trust by allowing TLC to film some of his more vulnerable moments. Again, that is just me. I may not have 17 kids, but I do have a child with a diagnosed mental illness and I feel this will come back to bite them in the @$$ (although Hunter will probably make a mint from his tell-all book).
The episodes at the end of last season and this season have several examples of Kody behaving badly during disagreements. He tends to shut off those who disagree with him and behave autocratically and imprudently during disagreements. I don't know how to explain Robyn's behavior during disagreements other than "yikes".
So, in one way or another, the Brown adults don’t fare very well under this examination. But I’d like to know what you think.