UPDATED!! Review S03Ep08: Another Wife

Love should be multiplied, not divided...Kody Brown

I'm confused. Really confused. First we have Kody, saying in the introduction, that Love should be multiplied, not divided...then later, we have his friend Andy saying if he enters the Principle of Plural marriage, he would be cutting his family in half. What's up with that?


Robyn as a Monet

You know, I've come to the conclusion that watching this episode was a lot like looking at a painting by Monet - from a distance it looks really good, but when you get real close, you see it's a mess. (Thank you Cher, from Clueless).


Yep, this is one mess of an episode, especially that Warren Jeffs bloviating by the Kodester. But before we get to that joyful piece of ministry, let's find out how two of the Brown teens are doing.

YAY! Hunter wants to play football again! Janelle is optimistic. " He might still be struggling," she says , "but at least there's gonna be this one thing that will be really awesome for him". And what's this? Madison has lightened her hair! Yes, according to Kody, she has tired of being grumpy so she's trying out a new attitude and a new 'do. "Yeah," Kody says, "It makes me wonder why you ever went black." Really Kody? Think about it, black hair in a sea of blonds. Who do you notice more? I rest my case...


Goody, goody! We get to meet more of the adult Browns' friends. I am simply beside myself to see some more friends - I just can't wait to hear what they have to say! So let's meet Andy and Nicole!

We find out that Andy and Nicole share the same faith as the Browns, the difference being their marriage is still monogamous. As described by Christine on the couch "...they are just wuuuunnnnnnnnnderrrrrfffffullllllll peeeeeeeppppllllllle." I kid you not, that's how Christine described them: They are just wuuuunnnnnnnnnderrrrrfffffullllllll peeeeeeeppppllllllle. Holy Toledo, Christine, could you sound more fake?


Oh, there's the knock on the door. Here they are!

Now at first, they seem like a nice enough couple. We find out they have six kids, and Andy wants to ask Kody "How do you date as a married man?" Now, I've heard through the grapevine that Andy's first choice to ask this question was Eddie Cibrian, but he was too busy. Second choice was Kelsey Grammer, but, well, Kelsey is just Kelsey. The others were either too old or dead, so Andy was stuck with asking Kody. Major bummage.

So the Brown's pack up the vehicles, and drive up to Mt Charleston for a picnic with their Lehi friends! Of course Kody leads the way in his 5th wife better known as his Lexus sports car (and don't you forget it) but that's not Robyn riding with him. Guess she rode her broomstick instead and let one of the Brown kids ride in her seat. Wait a minute, she's riding shotgun in that Honda van in FRONT of the Kodester sportster. Wow, Robyn is truly leading this group out of the darkness and into...well...the wilderness, yes, that's it!! This way to the food, fellas!

Yum Yum! That cookout is looking really good. Guess next time I should eat first before watching because all that food is making me really hungry. And while Andy talks about how bad he is at finding a second wife, all I can do is watch that yummy hamburger he's holding. Up, and down, and all around that burger goes as Andy talks and talks and talks. Finally, Meri says "Hold your nose and jump in with both feet!". So THAT'S how Robyn got to be the 4th wife, eh?

Holy Guacamole! Did I just hear what I thought I heard? Did Andy just say a polygamist living in separate homes is like a divorce? No way! My ears are lying to me....HIT THE REWIND!!

Meri was ...

Not Amused!!

Yep, he sure did. In front of Meri, and kids and Christine and whoever else was in earshot. He said "In Utah, you guys all lived together as a family, Now you don't. So whether anyone wants to admit it, or not, essentially you've got shared custody with Kody. So now its almost a divorce...Sorry if this is sensitive but this is on my mind..." Wowsers, I thought Kody was an insensitive jerk. This guy takes the cake. What is it with polygamist men. Are they all totally incapable of a modicum of human empathy? To say something like that in front of the wives of your supposed "friend" and their children. Wow, unbelievably crass. And Andy says "Our wives are our treasures", yeah, right. If I were you, Nicole, I'd hit the road before that arse has time to bring in his next brood mare.

But Nicole just sits there, drinking her water. Listening to her husband bloviate (I like that word) about how hard it is for him. To see a good looking single girl and wonder if she's his next wife. And how he would have to leave Nicole to go to bed alone while he's with the other wife, cutting his family in half. He feels every single woman is a potential wife when he goes to church. He has to look down a lot and carry a big notebook (Thank you Michelle and Romy's High School Reunion!) Don't know what to tell you big guy, but it sounds like you've got bigger issues that Kody can't possible help you with. My suggestion? Find a religion that better suits your entire family and WON'T hurt your relationship with your six kids and Nicole. Now, that will be $300.00 please, and use the back door to leave. NEXT!

Like I said, it's like a Monet painting...

Oh no, not another Kody Brown Sunday Service. Those kids look soooo excited to be there, especially Mykelti.

Is it just me or does Christine have a condescending way of speaking during this episode?

"Now there is someone we can talk to alllllll offfffff thaaa tyyyyyyyyyme and we actually have his number!"


Hate to break it to ya, but those are letters - not numbers on that little  poster you created.


Next time, use PowerPoint. And numbers. Thank you.

Andy is asked to speak, and he likes to wing it. So he talks about how when he was a child, they had to hide, and how evil can flourish when people are hiding things. He sees the Browns as leading their people out of the darkness, and into the light. Actually my high school American Government teacher use to say that but it sounds good here.

Ugh....Kody's turn to bloviate. All about the evil known as Warren Jeffs, and that he was like King Noah ben Zeniff from the Book of Mormon who was evil just like Jeffs. Jeffs was a bully, who married young girls and was just plain evil. Kody, what does Kingship mean? Anyway, although Warren Jeffs is probably his first or second cousin, Kody intones Jeffs should have been stopped by his own people. Instead, he was stopped by the state of Texas. Now Christine feels they should not discuss the FLDS at all, so that the poor sheeple will come out of hiding and into the glaring light of the "good" polygamy their faith shines on the world. She is quite the activist. She over spoke Kody several times. Andy admits when he was young he was a thug (and I think he still acts like one, too). I kind of lost why Andy mentioned this - perhaps it was to illustrate how he wouldn't change until he knew he was no longer being judged and that's what the American public must do - stop judging the poor sheeple of FLDS. I'm just not buying this stuff. Whose idea was this to talk about the FLDS and that Kody's religion is different? WE GET IT! THANK YOU!

YIPPEE!! - DINNER CRUISE TIME! Yes, although the Browns have no jobs, and are living on 'finite resources' they have GOT to take their Lehi friends on a Lake Mead Dinner Cruise. Now I let my fingers do the googling and found the Dinner cruise website. For seven people, without wine (plus gratuity)the cost was about $378.00. Approximately the cost of one week food for one family all spent in one night entertaining friends. And we don't get to see them eating. Yeah, no pictures of Robyn turning her nose up at the food smells, or shoveling the food into her mouth. What a waste.

Nicole looking relieved that Kody married Robyn before Andy could

But what we do see, is a very uncomfortable looking Nicole fielding questions from Kody and his Sisterwives. It is painfully obvious this lady is not ready for a sisterwife. You can see it in her eyes. When she says "We're sacrificing our relationship for [the Principle] but its worth it to us..." I want to scream DON'T DO IT! But it's their life, and like Meri said "You won't know the benefits fully until you live it..."

So it goes. (Thank you Kurt Vonnegut!)

Your Thoughts?