Review: S05Ep05 Mourning the Loss and S05Ep06 Confronting Failure

All right, let's just get the Drake situation out in the open. What is obvious to me is that Kody took this sad event as an opportunity, once again, to feed his insatiable need to be THE CENTER of attention by showcasing his return to Utah for the first time.  Come on, digging the grave while the dog is walking around, wagging his tail? And that oh so dramatic 'breakdown' ? When Kody says "This is so depressing" all I can do is scream at my poor TV,  Puuuulllleeeezzzze!!!!!!!

Kody wasn't suffering  from the emotion of digging a grave - he was suffering from the effort of doing W.O.R.K. And don't be fooled when Kody 'cries' about not being able to say goodbye to his home in Lehi. HE STILL OWNS THE HOUSE IN LEHI... and left Lehi because he always wanted to live in Las Vegas. Kody has got to be the WORST actor on the face of this planet.

Let's just hope Meri and Kody weren't feeding poor Drake that green kool-aid.

'Nuff of that, let's talk about physical fitness!

Poor Trainer Bill. He has officially left the building and Trainer Sean has stepped in as his replacement.  Janelle has finally admitted to herself that she's an emotional and stress eater, and how a 10 pound weight loss in 6 months just doesn't cut it. She has also come to the realization that maybe it was better to exercise on her own rather than with her sister wives. With a set goal of losing 100 pounds (and her trusty green kool-aid to keep her hydrated), she now exercises in the early morning, when she knows her sister wives are still sleeping.

Ah the joys of plural marriage. It just keeps getting better and better!

So what's happening on those McMansions? Kody and his Kodettes go to Mona the real estate lady's office to finalize those options, like which cheap looking granite (out of only THREE cheap looking choices) for the counter tops, and that Meri still hasn't made all her decisions, but is still over budget on just her first page of options.

It's obvious Meri may be mourning the loss of her ever loving mind! Finally, FINALLY, the options are all worked out, but as they leave the office, Kody says something that's really puzzling. He said that Mona the real estate lady reminded him that they still need to maintain the little good credit they have, and continue to clean up their crappy credit  " as [they] move forward for the final purchase."

Say WHUT???? Did Kody just say move forward for the FINAL PURCHASE? I thought those McMansions were a done deal! So maybe, Christine wasn't lying after all, and her lips were indeed loose when she said they didn't get the houses?

Despite all of this ominous foreshadowing, we are still shown the ground breaking of the McMansions...well, Christine's McMansion. They even celebrated  with some red colored bubbly drink. But back on the couch, Kody explained that " We have a bunch of work to do, from the time that we make a contract to purchase the homes til where we are actually purchasing them."  When Meri tried to clarify by saying "...so really we could go through this whole process of looking at the homes and picking everything out and getting so excited and something could happen and we could not be ..."  Kody didn't let her finish, saying instead  "...we could lose it altogether! This is not a guarantee!"

Holy Toledo! Do the producers think this Did They or Didn't They tactic is going to sit well with the viewers? Is there a reason why the producers think it's necessary, at this late date, to still string the audience along for the ride? Earth to Figure 8: We want to see the Browns move in those McMansions they can't afford! WE WANT IT!!

Seriously, I think we (the audience) are being set up for the return of the Browns to their Lehi home. But here's a suggestion...how about the Browns relocating to four double wides in the Nevada desert first? Are you listening, Figure 8?

While the Browns confront the possibility of their McMansions going busterino, Robyn has her own problems. Yes, I am talking about that sorry launch of My Sister Wife's Closet!

But business before pleasure. Yes, I'm talking about Mykelti's dream of being a fashion designer. Was it just me or did Mykelti not look too excited about meeting a real fashion designer? I don't know, when I was Mykelti's age I wanted to be a designer too. I had notebooks upon notebooks of designs for dresses and shoes and hairstyles. But I'll tell you one thing, if I met a real life designer (Mary Quant was my idol) I would at least act somewhat excited about it. Maybe the fact that Kody took over the segment had something to do with it. It just didn't feel - right.

Frankly, there was no need to have Kody present, period. Kody, in his personality, chooses - no he DEMANDS to be the center of attention, even if it's a 5 minute segment about his teen daughter's aspirations to be a fashion designer. Note to Figure 8: This could have been a 30 minute show about Mykelti working with this avant-garde fashion designer. That would have been interesting. Kody, in his personality, trying hard not to ogle a fashion model getting into a garment was not interesting. It was weird.

At least Mykelti's mom Christine had something to cheer about. In confronting her failure, she finally succeeded in passing her real estate exam. So even though Kody was not very supportive of her, it was wonderful to see her smile while saying " I passed!" to her family. Equally delicious was her dig at Robyn, Meri and Kody when she mentioned how wonderful it will feel when she brings home her first commission check that she will use to pay off a family debt (most likely either Robyn's old Victoria Secret bill or Meri's cost overruns on her McMansion options).

And now, for what you have been waiting so patiently to read - the launch of My Sister Wife's Closet!

This little trinket will set your credit card back about $300.00 !! It's embarrassing to hear Kody's half brain explanation for the outrageous pricing. "In my head..." he begins, "our pieces I wanted to be somewhat iconic in the sense that they're different, they're unique to us, and they're not cheap." In other words, hold onto your wallets, Kody's gonna RIP YOU OFF!

It's so funny to read on the Facebook pages how some fans actually think the jewelry is not overpriced. In fact, one fan said she was glad the prices were high because you get what you pay for.

Honey, I have another saying for you, it's "A fool and his money are soon  parted."

Meri and Kody watching the visitor numbers going up up up!

Janelle not looking very optimistic: 300 visitors but no orders !

Kody's reaction to a fan's tweet about how expensive the jewelry is
 

Kody pondering how 28 sales will pay the mortgage for 4 McMansions

MSWC is overpriced junk. There, I said it. If Kody thinks this vanity venture of Robyn's is going to help finance those 4 overpriced McMansions, he is seriously deluded. Even Meri appears to be drinking the same Kody delusion cocktail when she arrogantly says " This is not discount jewelry." Hey Meri, maybe you should research how a discount jewelry business works and makes a profit before snubbing your nose at them.

And Robyn, perhaps taking some classes on running a business would help you and your little vanity venture. As it is, having your website go down every time the show mentions MSWC is rotten for sales. And don't turn to your hubby Kody for advice: He was a failure in  business - which is not surprising since he thinks price gouging makes good business sense. Next time instead of spending money for an expensive computer and gun for Kody, maybe invest in a better server for your website that can handle the traffic !!

Yep, the writing is on the wall for MSWC!!