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Wednesday, December 19, 2012

My Three Wives - Joe Darger and Family TLC Special.


My Three Wives   -  Joe Darger married his wife, Alina and the very same day also married Alina's cousin, Vicki. Joe's third wife is Vicki's twin sister, Val. Take a step inside the original "Big Love" and meet the polygamist family that started it all.
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ALL MUST READS!!!!!
Growing up Mormon fundamentalist (Darger Book Review) http://sisterwivesblog.blogspot.com/2011/11/troy-bowles-growing-up-mormon.html

WOW!!! The Darger's "Love Times Three" http://sisterwivesblog.blogspot.com/2011/12/wow-dargers-love-times-three-was-there.html 

After WOW!!!
http://sisterwivesblog.blogspot.com/2011/08/curious-case-of-virginia-hill-vs.html
http://www.mormonfundamentalism.com/ChartLinks/OwenAllred.htm

The Darger's on 20/20 - http://sisterwivesblog.blogspot.com/2011/11/dargers-on-2020.html

175 comments:

  1. Ugh, the boyfriend/fiance was very creepy. I couldn't put my finger on what bothered me about him. And did you notice they didn't show any guests or grooms family? I smell a made-for-TV wedding.

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    1. I think he's kind of creepy also. To each his or her own though...

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    2. I thought he was creepy in a way I couldn't figure out also. To each his/her own though...

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    3. I completely agree. I again got a creepy feel even for this family too. I guess I just can't grasp the "lifestyle". My mind would wonder too much of what my husband was doing with my "sisterwife" in another room of my house. Ugh. Sorry didn't want to get graphic, but.... So it would be a lose lose situation for me...1 house, 4 houses...whatever, would not work!

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    4. People in centennial park are very private. It's my understanding that the wedding at the Dargers was to placate her family and another more private ceremony will take place for his group. Only a few people from his family came.

      I think the Darger family is a more real portrait of polygamy. Albeit, polished up for T.V

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    5. I didn't like the boyfriend either!

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    6. omg! i totally got the creepy vibe too

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    7. He was creepy in a controlling way. Poor girl should have seen it!!

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    8. I've seen the boyfriend in a special about polygamy once. He was with a group and then got involved in drugs heavily. He left said group and then, changed his life and went back. During this particular documentary, he spoke of the lost boys, (for a moment, I thought he was one), and of the abuse, etc., that he had experienced. When I last saw him, during his segment on this special that I watched, he was fixin' to go to a dance and maybe meet a future wife. This was after he cleaned up his act and all. I believe he tried suicide, if I'm not mistaken. Anyhow, I yelled out when I saw him and explained all this to my own sister wife, (we call each other this as a joke. It's a woman who lives with us and is part of the family, even though we share no blood. We call her Aunt Liz.) So, there you have the saga of the boyfriend.

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    9. There was something about the fiance that bothered me too. He was just so arrogant and full of himself. But then again, the one thing I find in common with these polyg guys is they are sooooo full of themselves.

      Ok, being arrogant is one thing........but this guy has nothing to back it up. IMO, he comes across as a wimp who was picked on his whole childhood and now he's trying to be the *big man*.

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    10. Wow, he was in a 3rd documentary? I just saw him on "Our America" with Lisa Ling on the OWN network. It was called Modern Polygamy. It was driving me crazy where I'd seen him before so I kept googling until it all came together.

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  2. I feel a bit "nosy" for asking this, but they are the ones who keep bringing it up....which wife got to spend the wedding night with Joe, #1 or #2 ?

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    1. #1 Alina - hence why she is known as the first wife LOL.

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    2. I wanted to answer your question. Alina is Joe's first wife because he is married to her legally. Before they had their wedding ceremony with his second wife Joe and Alina went to the courthouse and got legally married. This is common throughout many polygamist families the first wife tends to be the legal wife.

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    3. There can only be one LEGAL wife "Obey the law of the land" the other 3 are only shack ups. I see where there is to be a new program about the Dargers, wonder if that means that the Browns, Kody and Meri, along with the 3 mistresses will be out the door????? I feel so sorry for those poor children, I sure hope they do some serious thinking before following in their parents footsteps.

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  3. I believe the boyfriend/fiancé was on Lisa Ling's Our America when she did a report on polygamy

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    1. You may be right about that. The guy that left the group only to return and search for a wife. If I remember right, that place is where the women find the hubby after praying. The young girl married her teacher.

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  4. @ Anonymous 11:01: I haven't been able to find it online to watch yet, but I could understand if the groom's family from Centennial Park would not want to be on TV: "Look at these plygs here!" Don't you think it's understandable? If this was my friend's or family's wedding I wouldn't have consented.

    GENERAL QUESTION: If I understood correctly this was supposed to be a new series and now it turned out to be an almost not advertised one off that was swept under the rug. What happened?

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    1. I asked my bestie about that last night (before watching the show). She reviews TV shows, mostly reality-based shows - she had actually reviewed this way back this past summer, and was getting her review ready to publish when TLC contacted her and advised her that the show was being pulled/delayed for now. They had sent her a DVD which is what she used to review the show, and she had to send it back. She was going to try and watch it last night, but said the version she saw needed editing. I'll ask her opinion when I see her this weekend!

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  5. Peanut Butter FritosDecember 19, 2012 at 11:38 AM

    Dang, I missed it. Now all I have is "My 5 Wives," which is some Rodney Dangerfield movie. Joe Darger and his beer commercial twins seriously gives me the willies, and this special would have entertained me.

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    1. I'm sorry I had to laugh! darn DVR!

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    2. "JD and his beer commercial twins" made me laugh as well as think of this delicious beer that's long been made and sold in Utah - POLYGAMY PORTER w/the slogan on its label, "Why Have Just One?" along w/his nude wives. LOL

      http://www.ibabuzz.com/bottomsup/backgrounder-the-story-behind-polygamy-porter/

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  6. Anyone know where I can watch the episode online?

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    1. It just aired again tonight. For some reason my dvr recorded it again.

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  7. So, Joe married his first wife and on the same day her cousin. Now, not wanting to be gross or anything but knowing that people who have sound religious upbringing are all celebate until marriage, how does he do the honeymoon when he is honeymooning two wives? Does one wife get the first few hours of the night and the other the second? And, what decides what one wife gets and the times?

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    1. I think you're overestimating the celibacy aspect. We don't know whether they were celibate or not. The Darger kids have girlfriends/boyfriends e.g.

      But either way: That really wouldn't matter too much to me- you draw a straw. Is it really that important who gets to spend the first night with the man and who the second?!

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    2. Joe said on the show last night (regarding his "daughter" who is actually his step-daughter and NIECE's marriage) something to the effect of they believe you should abstain from everything including kissing until married. I wish I had the direct quote, it was bullshit polygamist gold.
      And i do believe that he said regarding the wedding night "someone had to go first". So that was Alina, because she was older.
      So gross. so so so gross.

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    3. I've been wondering the same thing. Who got the sloppy seconds?

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    4. @ Jules: That is weird, since at least two Darger sons have girlfriends- with instagram kissing pictures to go with it. So... they changed their attitudes and became more liberal or they disagree with their children's lifestyle, but don't want to break off contact?

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    5. I feel Mr Darger is putting on an act. He makes sure his wives work out OR they will be OUT. He also wants them to dress nice and wear
      make up. In a way, he loves attention just as Kody does.

      If they didn't have kids...or perhaps one or two each...so the women can leave and be able to support themselves and their children, I wouldn't mind...but this life I feel is terrible. His wives are just as jealous as the Browns. One just as to look at their eyes when Joe is cuddling a wife right in front of another one.

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    6. i think the older kids so far are breaking away from the Darger family unit as they once knew it. Two girls have already gotten married very young. The first one (with a baby) doesn't live near them and the second one - Amanda is marrying into a plyg sect they're not happy about. One of the older sons (Caleb) lives in Provo (BYU and Mormon Central) and has joined the mainstream mormon church. The oldest son (Joe's stepson) has been living on his own for quite awhile (i imagine once he turned 18) and doesn't work for Joe.

      It will be interesting to see where they're all at 10 years from now. At least Joe's already seen that out of his plyg parents own 19 children - he's the only one who chose polygamy like them. albeit he's gone independent. so, a different plyg sect than he was raised in.

      I wish a couple of these plyg kids from Dargers as well as Browns could write a tell-all book from their perspectives but I imagine the fallout (if not 100% positive) could potentially be detrimental to their continued relationship w/their parents. so, i won't hold my breath.

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  8. Does Joe Darger have proof that his family inspired Big Love, or is he just boasting? It seems that pretty much every town in the South claims that their town inspired Footloose, and every college claims that their frat scene inspired Animal House.

    The Centennial Park guy, Rob, reminded me of the narrator from the Rocky Horror Picture Show. "This man has NO NECK!"

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    1. In their book it says that Joe Darger's mom was up the the mom of the year award as Barb was. When they found out she was a sister wife, they decided not to give her the award.

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    2. Hmmm, I suppose that it's possible that the Big Love storyline about the Mother of the Year incident might have been based on the Dargers, but I'm not seeing that many other similarities.

      Regarding the revocation of that award, I wonder if the Dargers were planning to use the award to boost their agenda and/or give a middle-finger to Utah. "See, a sister-wife won the Mother of the Year award in Utah. Polygamy is so awesome!!"

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    3. No, they have proof: The Dargers were on the cover of a magazine for polygamous Mormons. The creators of Big Love, Mark Olsen and Will Scheffer, saw the magazine and that gave them the idea for the show. Mark Olsen himself said so: “They really do exist. There’s a great magazine out there that was published for the polygamist community called Mormon Focus Magazine. And the first cover issue shows, virtually, this family - the suburban integrated polygamist family.”
      http://articles.courant.com/2006-03-05/entertainment/0603030316_1_polygamy-colorado-city-tony-soprano

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    4. Hi Kat: thanks for the link. What I've seen suggested in other articles is that the Olsen and Scheffer already had an idea for a show about polygamy, but were afraid the topic wouldn't be marketable. Three years of research into the issue, including reading the Mormon Focus magazine, promoted the idea that semi-modern, suburban polygamous families exist.

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  9. Can't quote Joe, sorry I'm too lazy to go check my dvr, but regarding the wedding nite with the two wives, he said something like 'it was understood one had to go first and one had to go second. One of the wives was hanging on him and just smiled. Oh so creepy/gross, I about fell of the couch.

    On another note...I'm a personal trainer, I also work with a male personal trainer. Obviously I think it's GREAT that these people workout. I wasn't paying attention, was that their own personal gym on their property? Looked like it. Good for them, but more of Joe's ego. Was it for the camera or does he always hug/kiss, etc..all of the wives while they're working out? And for them to say "Joe is really the trainer here" Oh please. His ego is as big as his big round head, ugh. That whole scene made me sick. Blah. My husband walked through and says, 'WHAT is up with you watching all these plyg shows??!' lol

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    1. The one who was hanging on and grinning like the Cheshire Cat was Alina - the one who got to sleep with him first over her simultaneously married second wife. Alina is First Wife as she is the one declared legal wife. They say it doesn't matter - but yes, it does. She's the only legally recognized wife. That counts in lots of ways - legally and psychologically.

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    2. This may be in poor taste..*apologies if so*...

      But I so would not want to be "second" in my first "nite" with my new husband !!!
      That is just sooooo not honeymoon-ey or acceptable !!
      Huge, huge Yuck on that !!!

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    3. Yogagirl: I just LOLed at your husbands reaction. Too funny

      I don't watch the dangers, one plyg family is enough for me.

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    4. I got the idea that Joe spent an entire night with each wife during their honeymoon period - not half a night with one then half with another. At any rate, if it was still really bothering them after 21 years...I doubt it.

      as far as "nervous laugh" - that to me is more of a habitual thing, kind of like the folks who cough before speaking or say ummm...ummm...

      and again...if they are all touchy-feely people, what's wrong with PDA? that was missing from both of my marriages. I myself am VERY touchy feely.

      It also seems to me that all of the adults are great at planning ahead, which is a terrific skill to have, after all don't they run a party-planning business? NONE of the Browns and YUP I'm including Janelle in this, are any good at planning, they are all flying off the seat of their pants.

      I'm sure that many folks here will peg me as pro-plyg, and I am NOT, but my main concern with the lifestyle's drawbacks is its possible effects on the children - who had no choice in what family they were in unlike the adults. It's not the lifestyle for me because I am a one-man woman and I can be totally jealous, but hey, if they can make it work and raise happy healthy children into responsible adults, then more power to them. :)

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    5. DAWNA - "the Dangers!" a freudian slip of one letter might be speaking a volume of truth! lol

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    6. Yogagirl: My whole family makes fun of me for watching these plyg shows too! I am so fascinated by it but I find it disgusting!

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  10. I only watched the first 15 minutes - 10 PM is really late for me, and i was already watching The Voice Finale to get my Adam Levine fix :)

    That said I'm really glad you started a post on the show, and hope to see a review from CJ! I did enjoy the first 15 minutes, what a contrast to the Browns even from the very first SW show. I really liked the affection shown in the family which the Browns lack in SPADES. Clearly the wives really like each other rather than just tolerating one another as we see in the Browns' case.

    I'll watch the rest of it tonight - as a fitness instructor I'm interested to see the workout that the Darger family does, looks like plyometrics are involved, meaning the family is in AMAZING shape. LOL I just thought of Robyn's suggestion that the Darger wives work out with the 3 Brown wives - it would be like me working out with Lance Armstrong...i would totally look ridiculous, even though I consider myself to be in very good condition considering my age (50).

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    1. Hi DJ, rewatched the workout scene. I wasn't paying attention last pm, yes, it's a home gym in their garage and they showed a very small portion of their workout. Yes, they're in great shape and I think that's so important for them in raising all those kids (energy!) and mental health. They did have some plyo boxes, which as you know are $$$, but really not a whole lot in their gym-just well put together and a smart investment for 4 adults, IMO. I also noticed they seem to eat very healthy. There has to be a connection in why they seem happy and energetic and the Browns are so depressed/crying all the time.

      Hey, I'm 50 too, we're probably in better shape than lots of 20 yos! lol

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    2. "I'll watch the rest of it tonight - as a fitness instructor I'm interested to see the workout that the Darger family does, looks like plyometrics are involved"

      Did you mean to say ... plyg-ometrics?

      (bwaa-ha-ha ;-)

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    3. During the show the Dargers tweeted (@TheDargerFamily): " For more on our workout routine, we will blog on it @ http://lovetimesthree.com You can also check out http://Crossfit.com "

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    4. @SoilentGreen-plyg-ometrics! LOL!!! good one!

      Crossfit? Ok, maybe it's their own Xfit method, whatever, not the kind I've done. Having a controlfreak husband as my trainer would bug the hell out of me, whatever they are doing!

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    5. and don't be hugging and kissing on me when i'm huffing and puffing, hot and drenched in sweat either! Hopefully, that was just something they had to endure for the benefit of the camera being there this time. ugh. I think Joe is absolutely creepy about "his women."

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    6. LOL Yogagirl...I've not done XFit, but I have lots of friends who have and swear by it. I'm more into cycling and weight training myself! Besides the Crossfit shops (of which tons have popped up in my area over the past year) are SO expensive...yoikes...

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    7. My husband and I tried crossfit for a while but it got too expensive. Now we just do Bodypump or Crossfits' daily workout or modify it with what we have in our home gym. I love it though! I wish we could go back.

      I like that the Dargers eat healthy and put effort into their physical and mental health. I feel like the Browns wouldn't be so unhappy, depressed and stressed out all the time if they put more effort into living a healthier lifestyle. I definitely think Janelle tries the hardest though.

      I want the Browns to be replaced with the Dargers! I am team Darger all the way and I would love to see more of them.

      Anon 10:06- I always am thinking the same thing while I'm working out, I'm all gross and sweaty and yet my husband does not care. I've heard him, and other guy friends of ours, mention on many occasions that they are turned on seeing their wives work out and knowing that they put the effort in. So I guess it's a compliment even if I think it's gross to want to kiss me after I've just ran 3 miles.

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  11. I too got a creepy vibe from the boyfriend/fiance. He had what I refer to as "crazy eyes."

    All in all, I found the show to be kinda boring. You could play a drinking game with the number of times Alina nervously laughs. I'm guessing she was the "lucky" one who got to sleep with Joe on the wedding night (gag!).

    I am impressed that all of them work. Are you listening, Kody, Meri, Christine and Robyn?

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    1. It wasn't hard to guess which one of the two got to sleep w/the PJ first on their duo wedding night. Alina was the one w/the big cheesy grin the whole time while the other one kept looking over w/sad resignation. Obviously still a big "SCORE!!" for Alina 20+ years later. (and a twinge of memory pain still for the other one.)

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    2. Man, that's got to be rough, losing your virginity to a guy who's just nailed your cousin.

      On the Darger website, there are couple of single women, apparently not of polygamous background, commenting that they'd be interested in the polygamous lifestyle. I wonder, are these women attracted to the communal lifestyle, but think polygamy is the only form of it? There are plenty of communes and "intentional living" communities in which one can live in a group setting, yet each woman gets her own husband.

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  12. Haven't seen the show yet, and didn't read the book. Troy Bowles and Cynical Jinx's reviews for good for me, but I will now read it.
    So far, I just have a few opinions and they may very well change.
    I will say this.
    Well organized machine.
    They are not afraid from speaking about religion. They live their religion. That I can respect, however different we believe.
    A Good strong father doesn't mean he doesn't confer with his wives. The more I watch, the more I'll see!
    IF, IF I were going to be in the principle, I would want my sister as a sister wife, and think it all makes sense in their world. I believe their is much more of a sibling relationship, and cohesive love in this family. For now.

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    1. "Well oiled machine"... that describes the adults and their relationships. Businesslike. Logical.

      Not like any marriage I've ever seen.

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    2. With three types of oil! (Snark.)

      Many apologies for being gross!

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  13. I see no place for polygamy in modern society and honestly think it is done for the man/sex no matter what he says. I respect the Dargers just as I would ask them to respect mine, but I do think the whole religion is strange. The Bible does not forbid polygamy and these people were raised to believe it from birth so it is not strange to them. I don't for one second believe my husband has to call me by a secret name to get into Heaven. I think it's totally wacky and I understand some may think my Christian faith is strange, so I'll just respectfully let them and the Browns live as they choose. We'll all find out the truth one day.

    Creepy religion aside, they seem like good parents and appear to really love each other. Alina/1st wife just seems happy to me. Val(?)/last wife seems so sweet. Vicki(?)/2nd wife seems reserved and very intelligent and much more serious than the others. I know she's a twin, but I think she is so pretty. Really, they all are. Like someone said up thread, Joe has a serious ego, but you need that confidence to live that lifestyle and to garner your family's respect. These men (Kody/Joe) act that way b/c they are seriously spoiled by their wives/families.

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  14. Mister Sister, I totally agree, if I were to choose this lifestyle (never).. I too would want my sister and my cousin, people you already have a love for. I was very impressed watching them. I got the feel that they are a REAL family. I read their book, and marrying sisters is not uncommon in their culture, one of the wives either Alina or the twins Dad married sisters, cant remember which one. So their mom was first wife and her sister was 2nd wife, I think that is how it went. I also liked that Joe runs several real business, and Vicki and Alina run a cleaning service with Val keeping the books for the business and taking care of the kids and I read in the book that she bakes all the bread for that bunch and does a lot of the cooking. If they did all of the decorating for the wedding, then they are very talented. I shudder to think what the Brown wives would have put together. Bring on The Dargers, I am sick to death of the Browns and their obvious dislike for each other. Saw that Meri took Aspyn and Mariah to Disneyland again this week, I just wonder how all those 7-13 year old kids in that family feel about 2 of the 17 getting to go but no one else. It disgusts me that these people were approved for mortgages with the history of bankruptcy's. One last thing and I will end my rant, The Darger women are very attractive, and dress very stylish, none of those tight undershirts under a tank top. I am without a doubt TeamDarger

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  15. I still don't get the connection between them and Big Love....

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    1. You can be happy that they are not a bunch of TEAR jerkers!

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    2. In their book it was stated that the wives were on the cover of a magazine, I think it was something like "Mormon Focus", the producers saw the magazine and kinda modeled Big Love after. In Big Love, The story that involved Barb wining mother of the year, then being found out to be polygamist and escorted out of the building before the ceremony really happened to Joe's mother. He talks about it in their book how he nominated her and she was chosen, but was then escorted out of the governors mansion when they realized she was polygamist.

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  16. From: Pamela, Springville Utah


    It was obvious that wife number 1 got to be first...and that there is still jealously over that by wife number 2. The whole scene over that was awkward to watch...I can't imagine having to live it. I also found it interesting that wife number 1 has what appears to be a bigger bedroom than the other wives. As for these "hot wives" I had to giggle. Those women are plain at best.

    The boyfriend/fiancee is a control freak, odd, and has no neck. Inbreeding anyone?

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    1. "plain at best"? I think they're gorgeous personally. and in great shape physically. Still need to watch the entire show to see if there is a real jealousy vibe. Didn't see it in the first 15 minutes.

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    2. Yes...plain.

      Wife number 2 admits outright to jealously. Wife number 1 is very smug as though aware she is his favorite.

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    3. Yes and that Alina has an odd nervous giggle after nearly everything she says. Plus she's got that gurgle in her throat that made me keep having the urge to clear my own just listening to her.

      But nonetheless, petty idiosyncrasies aside, their family organizational skills win hands down over the Browns utter lack of them BUT i'm still not sold on the "ultimate beauty and joy of polygamy" that they're marketing. It was just an hour long selling infomercial to the public and I'm certainly not buying all their marketing hype about it.

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    4. It was obvious that Alina spent the first night with Joe. However I don't think that Vicky was/is still jealous. I thought she just seemed kind of embarrassed that they were talking about it.Not out of jealousy, just because she seems reserved in that aspect.

      I think they are all very pretty and healthy too.

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  17. JDarger or Grody anydayDecember 19, 2012 at 2:06 PM

    I thought the former posts listed were all excellent!!!!
    Troy relates it to his own knowledge and being in the AUB - even describing the Dargers as nice people.
    Cynical Jinx found an OOPS in the book! It goes right into the AUB, which goes into the next post about Christine Brown,and the theft and evil in the AUB.
    NOW I am interested!!!

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  18. JDarger OVER Grody anyday...December 19, 2012 at 2:08 PM

    Good golly, new at posting. Meant to name myself J Darger OVER Grody anyday! NOT OR eeewwww...

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  19. NEITHER Team Kody nor Team Darger for me ...December 19, 2012 at 2:44 PM

    'nuff said.

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  20. I don't know if was me or not... but now I wished I recorded the episode on my DVR to go back and look.. There was a close up shot of one of the twins' hand. I could swear she had a sister wife ring on. Did anyone else see this?

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    1. Apparently one of them did have one of the MSWC rings on because Meri tweeted about it.

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    2. She did. One of the Browns tweeted about it.

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    3. HAH! and yet NONE of the Sister Wives had any of the jewelry on in the episode featuring the BIG launch of the site. I noticed tho that Kody actually had on that custom claggagh ring they gave him. FIRST time i've ever seen him actually wearing it. I remember he didn't act too impressed with it either when they presented him with it. In fact, iirc - Christine even called him out on it. Awkward.

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  21. I enjoyed this special. They seem like a nice, loving family. The wives are beautiful & seem to love and respect each other. They were organized, have jobs & the means to support all their children. I love that they share a home, including the kitchen which seems to be a big problem for the Browns.

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  22. Had to watch the show a second time as I wasn't paying close attention last pm. Got a slightly better feeling this time, though it's interesting if you've read their book. They don't mention on the show really why the third wife came to live with them, that she and her kids lived in a trailor on the property for quite awhile, etc...which is fine it was only an hour show. Have seen similar of them on several other shows, Oprah, Dr Phil, etc..pretty much the same.
    The funniest thing watching the show is the commercials of SW!! We go from watching this very organized, WORKING family to commercial break of the Browns total chaos! Hilarious and sad all at the same time.
    Joe actually seems to spend time with all of his kids and is very loving towards them, unlike Kody, who passes them off on to the women and probably doesn't even know all of their names.
    Not my choice of lifestyle, but I'm impressed with the Dargers who have multiple jobs, WORK, keep a very nice home, are organized, and seem to all get along very well.

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    1. I'm sure after a few seasons of te Darger's we'll start seeing the cracks in their family just like the Browns. Or if I could get a peak into the wives' medicine cabinets.

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    2. I've read their book and think Joe is alright. In my mind while reading the book I pictured him as kind of a dorky kid but I think he is decent now. (As far as plygs go) ;) I think he runs his "ship" really well and I don't think the wives fear him and just do what they're told. It seems to me that they like order and schedules just as much as he does and it works for them. Although this lifestyle isn't for me, I love how the 3rd wife came into the family. Although he benefits from having a 3rd wife *wink wink* I think the 3rd wife and the kids benefited just as much. According to the book they didn't have the best life before she moved and he took her and her kids on and raised them as his own. As far as their exercising goes, I didn't get the impression that the wives were competing for who is thinner or anything. I think they are all health nuts and it's just how they are.

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    3. what a nice change from the trainwreck Browns!! not a fan of the plyg lifestyle but at least the Dargers are a happy an loving family with J_O_B_S and I agree the dad is creepy but he dose seem to love his kids and has some interaction with them. I am done watching the trainwreck greedy ass Browns!! the NERVE of them to think that people are going to spend their HARD EARNED money on such overpriced JUNK!!!! Ya ll need to get a damm JOB!

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    4. hahaha Yogagirl - I noticed the HUGE disparity between the Dargers and then the commercial for the upcoming Brown Road Trip episode where Kody says "we're going to Navoo, Illinois!!!" and the less than excited reaction of the kids, especially the teenagers. Kind of like the Griswolds...can we all sing it now...Holiday Rooooooaaooooaoood..."

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  23. Ok, this is a really weird thing to be worrying over, but I couldn't help but think, in a world that claims to be all sensitive over jealousy issues, and being thoughtful to other wives -- why on earth would you insist on this big fancy wedding when it is clear that no other future sister wife in Centennial Park could possibly expect to have? So not only do we have grinning about a special wedding night (I thought that was creepy during the show) but we have lovely pictures to look at that a future wife could never expect to have?

    I don't know -- I don't like polygamy, and I don't like what it does to women, but I thought this was just asking to rub some future wife's face in it.

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    Replies
    1. I thought the same thing, GEML. Also, I kept thinking that we're going to be watching the evolution of the Moms/PJ earlier fundie looking pics (hair, dress, no makeup) into modern day looking women today evolve in reverse w/Amanda. They will soon be looking at Centennial Park fundie plyg looking pics of her within a few short years. Provided she stays w/that guy that long. He definitely gave off a controlling/creep vibe. We'll see . . .

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    2. We thought the whole scene at the park was very odd to see the daughter and her fiance sitting at the park bench and the only one talking was her fiance to her parents. She didn't open her mouth once.

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    3. Just a thought- I thought the same thing. That guy was a controlling prick and you could tell her already made claim on her. And his comment about the FIRST wife that I'm going to spend the rest of my life with was so gross. She'll be dressed in braids and plyg garb in no time.

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    4. He gave off a very creepy, possible abusive, vibe to me. I also got the impression that the daughter was not a fan of Pa Darger. One other thing I found interesting was at the end she said something along the lives of we are not planning on taking a second wife but we do believe in it. It seemed as if she was saying that she thought they may stay monogamous but it was obvious her husband plans on having as many wives as he can get. I also see her in the fundie garb and completely cut off from her family soon if she stays with him.

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  24. That picture of them laying down with their feet up behind them is so creepy that I can't stand it. The whole thing is just awful.

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  25. I watched this special and found them way more in control and successful then the Browns. I think while there are underlying jealousies, the dargers are closer has a family. I think that really comes from sharing a house. They are forced to work together and iron out any ill feelings or disagreements. Whereas the browns can be mad at eachother for weeks since they realy don't see eachother on a daily basis.

    I liked how the dargers are planners! When they met to plan the wedding each one has a laptop or phone and planned it out so everyone had a job. Helloooooo browns don't plan crap. They don't work together. They have no foresight.

    Amandas new hubby seemed like he would be the evil banker or kidnapper in a movie. He just looks mean. Also, to the poster that said the darger wives were "plain looking at best" I have to disagree. I think they're all beautiful! Especially the twin with the bigger eyes. I like how they dress too. Way more attractive then tanktops with shirts under them.

    I would love to be a fly on the wall when the browns were watching this. Haha. Poor christine was probably crying and green with envy. Meri probably was just oogling joe. Robyn was probably just making excuses for kody. And janelle was just like "it not realistic for our family" and turned it off.

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  26. I felt they were trying to distinguish themselves from the Browns in many ways. There were many thinly veiled references to their differences:
    - kept calling his wives beautiful (has KB ever said that? I don't care what the rest of us think. They should be beautiful to him and he ought to be quick to say it!)
    - said they are not prudes and know people want to know about the sex
    - very cute and clean looking house: very cozy
    - said the kids sleep near whomever they get along with best (if the Browns did this, they wouldn't need so many houses)
    - all work at what seem to be labor-intensive jobs
    - at his party, someone mentioned bringing out the gifts and PJ said he thought the kids talent show was his gift (wasn't looking for a material gift unlike KB)

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    Replies
    1. I noticed (and liked) all those things, too. I thought the wedding was quite 'homemade' (in a nice way) and not over the top.

      Picture Mariah's wedding! Do you think she'll be married in the backyard? And the wives will put it on in two weeks. I'd watch that show... :-P

      Honestly, I thought the birthday party was lovely! And I did find that it showed in sharp contrast to a Brown family celebration... where some producer's assistant whispers in Kody's ear what wife #X has *always* wanted so Kody magically KNEW and provided said gift or Kody gets a $$$ present that he doesn't seem thrilled with.

      And I did notice how cuddly everyone is with the little kids and I like that.

      So I guess I feel like this: It's a sick and twisted lifestyle, but I like that it is clean, organized and employed. ;-) I know there is the ICK factor, but I also like that wife #3 is not younger than the first two...

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    2. I think the main difference in pj and krody is that Joe talks about HIS kids. He doesn't talk about HIS wives kids. When he was talking about HIS infant daughter who died he said my daughter. Krody would have said Janelle s or Christine's daughter. He wants his kids taken care of and he takes pride in their accomplishments. Kody takes pride in the number of them just like his wives. That is why we can expect to see a number 5.

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  27. Polygamy in itself just creeps me out. Joe Darger creeps me out. His wives to me seem too under his control and doing everything he says. They have to watch the way they look, be organized, have him as their personal trainer, do everything correctly. I wonder if all of the women would be such control freaks if Joe Darger weren't around to dictate everything? I can see why they are all exercising and dieting and looking fit. If one wife was out of shape, can you imagine the relationship she would have with the rest of them. Joe wouldn't be attracted to her and her sister wives would be pressuring her to follow the household rules. I mean, that's what I think would happen. It's easy to compare them to the Browns now because both families are on TV. In my opinion, I can find all kinds of fault with both families. At least for now I don't think the Dargers would put their poor old dog down for my viewing pleasure. I'm still very upset about Sunday's episode. I watch the show to judge the train wreck and hope one of Kody's wives will leave him, not to see a dog put to death!!!! If anyone else agrees, please send a note to TLC about this episode so maybe some clown at that station will maybe have some decency and at least have a warning the next time they want to put a dog down for no good reason! And please, don't write a comment saying "I'm sure there was a good reason." I will disagree with your opinion forever.

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    Replies
    1. I agree with you about Joe and the Browns dog. Something just gives me the creep factor about Joe...and I'm sorry that dog was wagging his tail and looked happy. Even if something was wrong with the dog obviously he was still enjoying life enough to give him the extra care he needed.

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    2. The Dargers definitely seem a lot more organized than the Browns. However, I got a Stepford Wives vibe from the Dargers. Joe comes across as very controlling. It seems to be a very patriarchal setup (Utah culture, in general). But maybe the 3 Darger wives don't mind being bossed around, I don't know. Some people prefer that. Not me, but I've known plenty who do.

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  28. I said they're plain looking at best...that's my opinion. I do agree that compared to the brown wives...they're very pretty and will admit they dress similar to me and are also like myself in great shape so props for that. lol I keed I keed..

    I see nothing pleasing about sharing the passion and intimacy I have with my husband with other "wives". I can agree that of most pligs they're not as odd as others I have seen.

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  29. I read the Dargers book "Love Times Three" and he makes it a point to make each wife feel special, so I think they're less insecure than the Brown family. They know they're loved by him. They each know they are special to him. You can tell with the Brown women, they dont feel loved and cared by Kody. Well, maybe Robyn. lol

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  30. Granted this Darger family is organized, civil, articulate and mature.
    But I really can't join the cheering section. Count me in as neither team Darger or Browns !!!

    As smooth and organized as the wives all appear, I see a vibe that speaks of "having to toe the line"..Joe's line. That aspect does marginalize the women.

    Of course, no question...
    They *are* light years above the Browns in class, attitude and performance !!!
    However, they (the women) still are satellites spinning around "the Man" who is the ultimate power and authority.

    I found it amazingly hypocritical that Joe states he does not want his kids to even kiss, let alone have sex, before a marriage commitment...yet HE routinely has sex on a rotating schedule with three women.
    Call me crazy, but that just did not compute as consistency.

    He and the girl's mother did not like the way the guy did not respect them in not asking for their daughter's hand in marriage, yet had NO problem hearing that guy (and yes that guy is creepy and definitely has a
    "cruel" and arrogant vibe) say that she is the "woman he wants to spend the rest of his life with"....at least as his *first" wife !!!!!

    That bit made me crazy. We have daughters and neither I nor my husband would want to hear that from a would-be suitor for them.

    But that's the crux of it all, isn't it?
    These people, the Browns and Dargers, just don't see anything wrong with a man not honoring and loving just one woman, even if it is their own daughter.

    One of the twins in a voiceover said that "she got jealous and thought "am I not pretty enough or *thin* enough?".......which says volumes of the pressure on them all to stay super fit? Whatever.....!

    Well, the raw truth is that in Polygamy, that's exactly HOW it is.....
    *NO* woman/wife can ever feel that she is *enough* for her man, for her mate !!!!

    A woman/ wife has to accept that HE will want to mate and have sex with other women *right under her own roof*..saying to those other women all the professions of love he says to her... and physically/sexually performing for them just like he does with her !!

    In the end, for me, the Dargers are simply an upscale version of Plyg life and the Browns are the down-scale version.
    Sort of like "America's Got Talent" vs the old "Gong Show."

    But in the end, it is a lifestyle that uses women as objects..as the vehicle for the "man's" desires, ego and beliefs.

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    Replies
    1. I could not agree more with every single thing that you just said!

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    2. @Amused, while I left some comments that were positive about the Dargers, I fully agree with all you have said here.
      I said some positive things about them, just from a point of view of any lifestyle (working out, eating healthy, spending time with children, working for a living)
      HOWEVER! I agree with you 100% on everything you said! My comments in no way make me a cheering squad for any plyg family/lifestyle. I find it very disturbing. Yes, the womens comments regarding keeping thin enough, etc...spoke volumes on the pressure and the fact that Joe is their OCD controlfreak 'trainer' really says something.

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    3. Let's be realistic here there are women in monogamous relationships that wonder if they are thin enough for there husband.

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    4. at least those women aren't watching two other thin women fawning, kissing, hugging all over their husband in front of them PLUS later going to bed with them tho while they're wondering!! lol BIG difference there.

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    5. BRAVO, well said, I am in total agreement !!!!

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  31. Amanda's fiancé was a total jerk and creep. I wanted to shake her and get her out of there. What is she thinking?? I honestly hate Joe and think that Val is clueless but he had ZERO respect for them. I couldn't believe the things that he was saying when they were sitting on that bench. He is ugly as hell too.

    What's up with ALL of this kissing?? There's just way too much. It's like they're trying to show how opposite they are of the Browns and how they're all SO ok with it. It's really obnoxious and gross. I love my husband and we're extremely touchy feely but not on TV..

    Poor vikie when they talked about the wedding night and Alina giggled like a school girl... How discussing and awkward. What a disgrace. Tlc could have edited her reaction in(because I saw them use the same clip when Joe talked about mistresses and prostitutes) but it was still sad.

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    1. I agree that all the Dargers constant kissing and touchy/feely was obnoxious and came across as trying to hard to convince us everything's smoochy/poochy in plyg paradise. It seemed obviously manipulative to persuade the viewers. "ok, Browns don't do it at all publicly. We're going to CONSTANTLY be doing it then! I need one or two wives fawning over me at all times in front of the camera. That's it."

      I'm more comfortable picturing that's the way it went down rather than think they REALLY do that constantly with each other every day! very obnoxious.

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  32. I don't understand the math. How can all their kids practice plural marriage? They dont have 4 girls for every boy born to the families.

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    Replies
    1. At least one of the kids (the oldest son Caleb) is not going to practice. And joe was the only one of his siblings who did.

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    2. I doubt that oldest blonde kid (stepson of Joe's and 3rd wife's oldest kid) will be practicing either. He doesn't seem too impressed with the whole mess himself. I imagine he also still has some unresolved daddy issues from his bio father. His mom was Wife #5 in that hellacious "marriage."

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  33. It also creeps me out how Alina always has this crazy crazy smile on her face whenever Joe hugs/ kisses her. She's saying "look America!! Look! I really am happy!!" Or is she saying that to herself.....? /:

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    Replies
    1. To me, she looks medicated. Or maybe just high on life.

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    2. It all looks like an unhealthy 3-way constant lovefest PDA competition w/those women. It was weird to see one or two of them hanging onto him at all times. Even still going on during their workouts. The women are looking for constant validation from Joe and he gets the constant vying competition of "who loves me more?" charade.

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  34. I am typing before I read so bear with me if I repeat

    The boyfriend reminded me of someone straight out of Children of the Corn. Smh I am ashamed of myself and loling at the same time.

    Boyfriend was so bad it looked like Joe almost wished his lil girl wasnt a poligimite.

    2nd wife gave me medicated holding on to resentment teas

    The Dargers are soooo taking over the browns spot. I thought I caught a little F you tone when he was like WE dont mind discussing our sleeping arrangements. WE all have jobs, ypu need to if you are in this lifestyle, and the list goes on.

    Dargers are way better then the Browns, though I still want Janelle and Christine to dip. Maybe that is why they were staying under budget to squeeze some rainy day fundage.

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  35. The ick factor is polygamy itself. I believe there is something biologically inate in a woman's wiring that tells us this is not right. There is a reason finding out your husband is cheating is so incredibly painful. It's not just the physical betrayal--it's the emotional betrayal. And to have to passively accept your husband having sex and emotional intimacy with other women because it's religiously "mandated" has to be the worst kind of mental anguish.....

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    Replies
    1. I agree, my husband cheated on me and it takes along time to stop thinking about everything that was shared (sexual and emotional)
      I can't imagine wondering all the time if my husband has more fun with any of his other women.Or being touch a certain way, knowing he does the same to other women that I have to live with and supposedly like.

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    2. oh, but ironically - you're making one their (plygs) favorite argument! they claim that since most men cheat, that at least in their setup - it's NOT cheating when you share your man with your sister wives. So VOILA!! - all that emotional jealousy crap that happens with monogamous marriages goes away w/living the plural lifestyle. BUT then they all want to turn around and talk about how they still get jealous at times after 20+years of plyg marriage!! HAH!

      Given human nature - polygamy is much more of a fail than monogamous marriage. Even if the plygs stay together lifelong - they're very emotionally damaged for the most part - all in the name of religion. blech

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  36. I think they are more a family being in the same house. I think a two room or room with alcove enough privacy for each wife. I like the kids are mixed together in bedrooms and occupy the same living and kitchen space. They have gotten who decides where the glasses go and which color to paint the wall. They are free with affection.

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  37. If my husband had another wife, he'd totally use the "I'm sleeping with someone else tonight" line if I were ever angry with him. You know Kody and Joe both do this. I'm sure all polygamist men do this though.

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  38. America's Got Talent vs the "Gong Show!" LOVED the comparison!

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  39. I feel from watching the Darger show last night, the three wives were definitely jealous of one another. Whatever they do, is to please their husband. For me, the only good thing I heard was that they all worked or at least two because then what happens with all the young children? As with all Reality shows, soon the conflicts will happen. A wife or two will disappear. What then happens to their entire town of children? Who supports them? Where would they live? The only wife that could leave would be Meri because she's the legal wife, and she and Kody only have one child. I don't believe this entire plyg life works except for the man's sexual desires. A marriage is supposed to be a team between a husband and wife. What do these women get emotionally from this one man? It doesn't make sense to me at all. The Browns are falling apart. Meri can't make one decision,
    Christine and Janelle are no longer happy, and Robyn is getting set to have more children. I think the taxes just went up for the residents of Nevada.

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  40. I personally like the browns better Kody is more personable and his wives are all so different unlike the corbon copies on this new show. the brown are much more real and relatable for me. LOVE YOU BROWN FAMILY! YOUR STILL THE BEST!

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  41. Dargers are trying too hard to show how they're 180 from Browns and other plyg sects on EVERYTHING - from finances to jobs to organization to open PDA to exercising to laughter and proclaimed happiness to EVERYTHING looking picture perfect ad nauseam. The staged overkill of it all makes it very unbelievable. But they have an agenda re: polygamy, so of course they're marketing themselves in the strong affirmative and no negatives. That's all.

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    1. I don't understand their religion and could never live in a polygamous marriage. That being said, the Dargers appear to be a solid, loving family. While the Briwns appear as 4 seperate families that share one man.
      I enjoyed SW until this year. I am tired of all the tears, the selfishness, the immaturity of this family. The last episode was the last time I will tune in. IMO the Browns need to take a few lessons from the Dargers.

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    2. Anony 11:37 - just to clarify: in NO WAY am i TEAM BROWN any more than I am TEAM DARGER. BOTH families are a huge turn-off to me - some for the same reasons and some for completely different reasons. Having said that, I'm sure I could find some good in both of them (dargers more so than browns) BUT the negs still would far outweigh the positive side - for BOTH!!

      In other words, if the Dargers are as good as polygamy gets (and it's the best i've seen - in what i've been sold so far by them anyway- in all the readings and research i've done the past few years, it's STILL polygamy and fraught w/the inherent damaging emotional problems w/that - for all the spouses (including the KING) and the children.

      signed, anony 9:59.

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    3. Hi Anonymous: I agree that even at its best, polygamy doesn't look very enjoyable.

      I just don't think that you can ever get rid of the problems of group dynamics in polygamy, no matter how well-intended you are. I'm reminded of problems with adult roommates. If you have one roommate and there's a disagreement, you can often talk things out, or end the living arrangement without a lot of harm done. When you have living situations of three roommates or more, it's common that the majority bullies the minority, and group-thought makes the majority more cruel than they would be in a one-on-one dynamic.

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  42. Anyway you look at it, plig lifestyles depend on the male having total dominance over the women. Joe and Cody say it and it will be done, well maybe not the Browns, I think they could wander in the Vegas desert for 40 years and never find there way back.

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  43. Love the blog. very informative. I'm very confused as to what makes it illegal to be married by paper to one woman and have your other baby mamas living in the same house getting along. this happens a lot outside of a religious or poly community where a guy has multiple baby mamas that are friends and very close. what exactly makes the browns or the dargers "illegal" if they're only married on paper to one woman and not claiming the others on taxes or anything else like that. Is there something else I am missing? I'm not trying to be a smarty, I am truly asking out of ignorance because I really do not know. And this is something my friends ask too. We just don't get how it's "illegal" if all your baby mamas live together and are friends. if anyone could help explain what makes what the browns or dargers is doing illegal, it'd help us to understand their struggle. thanks for reading and allowing people to post and ask questions. peace and love

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    1. Here is the Utah Code: 76-7-101. Bigamy -- Defense (1) A person is guilty of bigamy when, knowing he has a husband or wife or knowing the other person has a husband or wife, the person purports to marry another person or cohabits with another person. (2) Bigamy is a felony of the third degree. (3) It shall be a defense to bigamy that the accused reasonably believed he and the other person were legally eligible to remarry.

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    2. I do not know exactly how the laws read in Utah, but where I live it is illegal for more than two people to live in one household as conjugal spouses. I'm pretty sure that's how most anti-polygamy laws are written.

      Ironically, it is not illegal (where I live, and in many other states and provinces) for a married adult to have extra marital affairs, but if you have extra marital relations in your own household on an ongoing basis, it is illegal (polygamy). So, being sneaky and deceptive to your spouse is okay with the law!

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    3. With the way the economy is going, some families are going to be forced to live with one another just to survive. Not everyone can use the system like the browns.

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  44. My heart goes out to the daughter, i think her name is amanda? Her husband pinged my "abusive" radar like you wouldnt believe....he was just sooo sure of himself, wasnt he? sitting on that bench, he came across as so disrespectful and so arrogant! No humility, whatsoever....did he ever even crack a smile? I cant help bit wonder tho, i think the dargers are questioning if maybe, just maybe, they may b to blame, for their daughter joining up with the harder core centennial group?

    I mean, they are portraying themselves as the poster family for plygs, right? And now, u gotta think and wonder, at least as a mom, did i make polygamy seem sooo warm and fuzxy that my daughter is willing to join up with this bunch? As a mom, i want BETTER for my daughters. Just seems to me that prarie dresses, long braided hair, no make up, and a humorless, self important no neck little twitis NOT better....just made me so sad. But, its just my opinion. For her sake, i yruly hope i am wrong about him....

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    1. My heart broke as well. As a mom of a teenage girl I would do everything in my power to stop her from marrying a creep like that guy. I would put my foot down! She is still their daughter but obviously she nor the creepy guy had any respect for parents.

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    2. yes, i thought it was very telling that Amanda didn't share her engagement w/Joe nor even her own mother. She put it on facebook first and then was summoned. I'm sure if the kids were really allowed to talk and felt safe to do so, we would hear some great stories and complaints about growing up in the lifestyle.

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  45. Oh the "love at first sight' line again. I don't understand how they can all expect us to buy this. Only men can love more than one woman. Women are so in love with one man they will put up with him sleeping with other women. Nope, not buying it. I understand what's happening. To be direct, it's a breeding program. Can't have two husbands because that means fewer babies. One man, many women means lots of babies. Call it what it is!!

    AND if every one of their sons marries multiple women and live the 'principle', thus getting their own 'planet' and their daughters are sealed to their husbands..... doesn't that leave them alone together on an empty planet for eternity? And where do the extra women come from to make the sister-wives quota (ok, I know how it works, the boys get kicked out, but....). Somehow it seems that no one has thought this whole thing through.

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    Replies
    1. I always wondered about that as well. It makes zero sense about the whole planet thing if all of your kids eventually get married.. Or leave..

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  46. Well you know what, I like PJ more now. I would LOVE LOVE LOVE to have a hubby who doubles as a very affectionate personal trainer! I love me some PDA. I think it's natural for them not an act.

    The wives look normal to me. I still am NOT getting a Stepford vibe. I think they are pleasant well spoken intelligent women. who are more honest than the Brown wives. I love that they enjoy spending time together.

    Love his concern for the kids, and the house. and the cooking with emphasis on fresh/healthy stuff.

    of course I know that they are on their best behavior for the camera. but still...there are some things that I don't think they can hide. a lot of it just seems so natural.

    So is this going to be a series? who knows. the Dargers seem really happy and I don't get a vibe they want to rock the boat by having cameras around all the time. Maybe this was them putting their toe in the water to see if they could deal with their lives being dissected every week. who knows.

    but damn an affectionate personal trainer?? and I really liked the little birthday party for PJ.

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  47. I felt the show definitely demonstrated a different version of polygamy. All four members of the Dargers came from polygamous families. The head of the Brown clan did not get a second mom until he was grown. Also, Janelle wasn't from a polygamous family. I think it would be easier to live that lifestyle if you were raised in it.

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  48. Personally, I do not believe this family was making any effort to be in the Brown's faces. They showed exactly what they are and what they were before the comparison with the others. They live in harmony with each other and their life choices. Unlike the Brown's they are together because all 4 of them want to and not because TLC's $$ keeps them under contract/selfish-needs-to-fulfill. The Darger's simply show a different view on how polygamy works and in my unexperienced opinion, IT WORKS better. They seem humble yet classy; well structured and organized as a family yet with each individual integrity.
    I would work my butt off for such a confident, multi-potent Alpha-Male :)) Focus on ME, please!

    Going public for the Darger's might also be money driven, but I like to believe it is more for acceptance.

    On the comparison note: can you imagine the Kody-pendants putting together a wedding? From scratch? Hand-made flower arrangements and candles settings? Dresses? Decor? It would be wedding planner all the way and catering and fancy shops. Just saying...

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  49. Gag me...did Joe Dargers plethora of wives write the above Butt kissing posts about how amazingly perfect their nasty family life is? Spare us all...

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    1. @ 12:00 AM
      The working out the "butt" was a joke to simply justify the jealousy that might arrise among wife's.

      There are lots of men out in the world that are not capable of taking care of ONE wife and 1-2 children, let alone 3 or 4 wife's and 23 kids. So, here is my hat off to Joe for being the responsible head-of-the household he is appearing to be in this show. Not every one out there can provide a healthy and stable environment for a family, be affectionate to his wife and read to the children, etc.

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  50. I do not agree with the life style the Dragers or Browns live. With that said, the Browns are so dysfunctional and unorganized it hurts. The jewelry is way over priced and they have egos so big, they will end up in bankruptcy again. Kody is a cad and a tool. He is not man enough for the wives he has. All of his women control the family and can not agree on many things to bring their families together. Janell and Christine will never leave. Janell could support herself, but will not want to harm her children by separation Christine could not support herself and needs to be taken care of financially. Robyn likes having help by the older children. Aspergers is a challenge to live with and she wanted sister wives to help her raise her kids. The Browns should probably stop allowing the cameras to roll as they are slowly becoming the laughing stock of reality TV, like Jersey Shore. They lied about the dynamics of their family; food stamps, bankruptcy, well fare and so on. Kody said in one of the first shows they were financially independent and they weren't.
    The Dragers are a loving family. i don;t see Joe as controlling at all. I see him as a leader int he family and able to take full responsibility of his children and wives. The kissing doesn't bother me as I am affectation and hug all of the time. They sacrifice their independence for the good of the family, something the Browns do not do. I would like to see more Dragers to see if it was real TV last night. Browns should just stop while they still have some self respect.

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    1. I also would never choose this lifestyle for myself, but I don't think there is anything wrong with it if they are consenting adults. I started watching Sister Wives because I was curious about the lifestyle and was hoping to see a normal, happy family. The Browns have never been normal or happy. From day one, there were tearful moments on the couch and it was evident that the wives do not like each other. At least the Dargers seem to be a happy family who enjoy each others' company and actually help each other. All the wives seemed to be involved in planning and hosting the wedding. The Brown wives couldn't even get themselves to a highschool graduation on time. Kody doesn't seem to have any sort of a connection to most of the kids and his relationship with Janelle and Christine is definitely not very husband-like. Joe Darger is affectionate towards all his wives and the wives seem to have genuine relationships with each other. I hope Janelle and Christine read this blog and realize that they deserve so much more than Kody gives them and that they don't have to put up with Meri's abuse.

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  51. Is there anywhere to watch this online for free? I live in Europe, so I can only watch Sister Wives on certain sites, but I can't find My Three Wives anywhere. Thanks everyone!

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    1. TLC is rerunning My Three Wives on Dec 23 at 1pm EST. This probably won't help you in Europe.... http://tlc.discovery.com/tv-schedules/special.html?paid=2.15911.56746.0.0

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    2. fullepisode.info also has american tv shows and non american also www.free-tv-video-online.me/

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  52. Wow. All I have to say is wow. Like many posters before me, I got a creepy vibe from the boyfriend. I also felt bad for Amanda's mom and PJ. As a mother of a daughter myself, I would have found it hard to control myself as my daughter just sat there with that little man with no neck who was showing such arrogance, disdain and complete lack of respect for the people (at least the mother) who raised her, I would have about come over the table. He gave me the impression that he expected to be in control and have a completely, submissive wife. I hope I am wrong, but I bet she will be in a long dress, braids and pregnant before long.

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    1. I feel like there should be a "save Amanda" website

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    2. sadly, we all have our lessons. but yeah, i don't know how any mother would be ok with what she's marrying into plus SO YOUNG! but she gets to make her own choices - with or without PJ's and Mom's blessing. Neither one of them were really seeking PJ's approval anyway.

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  53. I think they are all nuts, both families. Both families are trying to make it work, but man woman woman woman or man woman woman woman woman isn't healthy or natural so there are going to be lots of conflict.

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    1. yeah, i'm surprised at the number of women here who are over the top smitten with Joe Darger. I don't get it at all. It's surprising to me that just cause he looks better than Kody (how HARD is that anyway?) then he's touted as THE MAN I"D GIVE MY RIGHT ARM TO SHARE WITH OTHER WOMEN!!! very strange to me.

      Well, time will tell if and when they get more exposure. I'm still remembering when so many were all about TEAM MERI first season here! I didn't get that one either. LOL

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    2. I can't speak for everyone, but for me it's not that I'm smitten with Joe Darger, but that when I watch the two families the Dargers just seem to be happier with their situation. Personally, I could never be in a polygamous relationship. The Darger wives seem to be realistic (they do talk about working through their jealousy), but appear to enjoy each others' companionship. They seem to work as a team to take care of household duties and all pitched in for the wedding. Joe comes across as being a very take-charge guy, but someone has to take charge when you have a family that large. In my opinion, other reality show fathers who can't take charge and take care of their families (such as Jon Gosselin and Kody Brown) are far more annoying than the fathers who can and do ensure that things are run in an orderly fashion. Was it last season that Kody couldn't even handle watching the younger kids (with the help of some of the teenagers) when the moms had an evening out on the Vegas strip. Really? You can't watch your own kids? He must have phoned his wives 10 times. If you can't handle having multiple children, then don't have them. Kody just seems to walk into the room, pat a couple of the younger kids on the head, rough house with the teens, and then leaves. We never see him doing anything remotely useful. What exactly is he doing to make any sort of an income? The wives all seem to be trying to start businesses, become realtors, etc. Joe at least seems to be involved in both the financial and emotional support of his kids.

      So... no, I wouldn't want to be married to either Joe or Kody, nor would I want to have to share my husband. But if I had to compare the two, Joe wins hands down just because he seems to take his responsibilities more seriously, shows affection to each of his wives, and actually is a father to his kids.

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    3. Just remember that you haven't seen the Dargers over a long period of time. Lots of people bought into the "happy happy happy" image of the Browns at the beginning of their TV run.

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  54. The similarity of the Dargers and the Browns is that the adults all made the choice to be in this type of relationship. That's where it ends.

    The Brown women are doubtless feeling trapped by their choices and the fact that for the most part they do not have any marketable skills or real job history (um yup J and C did pass the real estate exam but that doesn't automatically mean they have the skills to actually do the job...plus I know a LOT of folks with real estate licenses who are working in other fields because of oversaturation...). They are basically TRAPPED, including Janelle - sure she had a job, but she made $660 a week BEFORE taxes and she has sooo many kids to feed. I think she made it work by creative use of WIC/govt benefits that Christine received for her brood. And Kody paying child support? it is to laugh. Sure a judge could make him responsible for child support - these days, not being on the birth certificate means nothing, all it would take is a DNA test if Kody denies paternity. However, as I've said before, it would be like getting blood from a turnip. Not that he would hide his $$, but that he has NOTHING after the TLC $.

    Compare the Brown wives to the Darger wives. If any of them decided to leave - they are well dressed, well spoken, run SUCCESSFUL businesses, and I do think that PJ would pay child support.

    And coming from being in two marriages where my husbands have had little to no interest in fitness and working out - which is a major passion of mine - I would LOVE to have a boyfriend (I am SO not planning on marrying ever again) who not only shared my interest in fitness, but actively participated and encouraged my efforts!

    I remember a couple weeks ago following the Darger/Brown episode, several comments were made about the comments/demeanor of the oldest stepson (the blond guy who called PJ "Big, Bald, and Intimidating") and thinking that he was scared of his dad. Well...what I saw of his interaction with PJ on the Darger special (which again was filmed and originally was going to be aired MONTHS ago) could not be further from that. Clearly, PJ cares very much for all of the children and is concerned for their welfare. (that said, I did not care for Ralphie the fiance at all, but I got the feeling that PJ and wife felt the exact same way [as did the brothers]...however PJ is allowing his daughter to make her own decision...it's her life after all and she is an adult...)

    One more thing, I have seen comments both here and on TWOP theorizing that the Darger wives might be on meds in order to cope with their maritial situation. IMO - that's really none of our business, and there is really only so much meds can do. Now Christine did put it out there that she was on some sort of meds, but mental illness or depression is nothing to joke or make light of at all...IMO.

    Again - I wouldn't choose the lifestyle myself, but I see nothing wrong with the way the Dargers are portraying it. With the Browns, it's Kody first - the Kody Show, and everyone else just being dragged along in his wake. The Dargers is definitely FAMILY first. I really believe kids need routine and security from their parents when growing up. The Darger kids have both, the Browns clearly do not.

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    1. DJ, first let me say a long time ago on here, I saw your website when we were discussing fitness and your story is awesome!! So I totally understand your liking the Darger women working out with PJ!

      I've been married for 30 yrs (one husband!) lol and he supports my fitness career/personal workouts. We do workout together on occasion. But! No way, no how, would I want to workout every day with him (or 5x a week with him) and 2 other women-all while he is kissing/hugging on the three of us. Blah. Really I don't want any PDA while I'm working out, get outta my face. A high five from my male trainer is nice once in awhile and that's about it.

      My point being, if you have ONE man to go home to who is affectionate, it would make a big difference. These women have to split him up, thus the big PDA workouts. But to each their own I guess. I found it way over the top myself.
      Not to mention it kills their Xfit times when he stops and lifts them down to kiss them...hahaha!! (Ooooo. you are so right! earlier post-Xfit is crazy expensive!)

      Reading the medication comments, I think people who workout a lot and eat healthy, tend to be like this-happy, smiling a lot. I didn't get the impression they're on meds. I know I get kinda on the UP side after training people all day or teaching yoga all night. Just my opinion, but I think they are high energy people. And I've known lots of people with nervous giggles. I'm one of those super annoying people who starts every sentence with 'ummm...' Hate it, trying to break it!

      Always nice to read your comments DJ!

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    2. PJ is "allowing" his daughter to make her own decision?? hmmm . . . She's not a minor and she doesn't live at home. I imagine she's also working full-time while going to school and fully supporting herself as he starts the kids working young in their businesses and paying rent while living in his home as minors.

      How can he NOT allow her to make her own decision is the real question. The answer is simple. He has to allow it and therefore he does. ;')

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    3. also, she's actually PJ's stepdaughter. I sensed some tension from her around him, too. Maybe she's also hooking up with this kid she knows Joe wouldn't approve of as a passive/aggressive rebellious act. She's only 19, too. Too young to be getting married already - with or without stepDaddy's blessing. She'll get pregnant right off the bat now and start having a baby a year and it will be interesting to see if things turn quickly and her weird plyg husband cuts her off from her family. *shiver*

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    4. AW YG! Thanks for the compliments <3 <3

      I'd never be able to share a guy, but I do really like PDA quite a bit. When I was growing up my whole family (6 of us - me my parents and my 3 sisters) would regularly get on our bikes and ride around our little town or put leashes on the dogs and go on a family walk around the neighborhood. Those were great bonding times with my parents and we all got exercise too (although it certainly wasn't crossfit by any means...)

      Anon - true she's not a minor, and can certainly make her own decisions but remember they came to PJ to get his blessing so her parents' opinion and approval still matters to her. Kody talks a good game about letting his kids make their own decisions but we have also seen both him and the wives exert a lot of pressure on the kids to be plyg when they get older.

      So the teens work in the family businesses, what is wrong with that exactly? many people who own their own businesses have their kids work in them. it works out well for both parties and also prepares the children to assume the reins when the parents decide its time to retire. see that happen all the time. It builds character IMO. As long as school is prioritized and kids have their own time, i don't see the problem with it. my parents started having us all pay rent ($40 a month starting when I was 17, in 1979-80) to assist in paying for the weekly cleaning services that came in. we were all to busy to do chores! So we were all expected to contribute. No biggie.

      I'm not saying the D's are angels or perfect but I don't think you can doubt that the kids come first in this family the way they don't at the Browns.

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    5. I don't really see anyone NOT saying the Dargers are better than the Browns. That's a no-brainer really. I just see a lot that beg to differ re:the Dargers are THE way to go. It's still polygamy even w/the Dargers. Still breaking the law and they admitted to having taught their kids to lie about it at one time. I don't agree w/picking and choosing what law you'll live based on your religion. They're out now cause they really know they have nothing to fear unless they're committing abuse or tax/welfare fraud. Also, they own their own businesses which apparently aren't affected by the fact that they're out of the closet w/their plyghood.

      Every time they want to whine about their forefathers going to jail for polygamy - i think "yeah, so?? it's STILL against the law yet you know you WON'T be going to jail for it! So how about showing a little gratitude for that well-known fact now!" i just hate the continuous "we're so persecuted" b.s. garbage from them and the Browns. *eyeball roll* iirc, 3rd wife comes from being on the welfare rolls before she got into her sister's family. it's been awhile since i read all their backgrounds.

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    6. PJ says he expects their kids to start paying their share of rent by the age of 14. that's pretty damn young. and why are they supposed to pay for themselves as dependent minors anyway when it was their parents choice to bring them into the world??

      If you want to get some more insight into this family, go read the 1 and 2 star reviews on amazon (as well as the comments to those) about their book. Troy Bowles has weighed in heavily over there.

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  55. Pamela, Springville Utah



    I come from a blended family of thirteen kids including myself. I am telling you right now...those kids do not get enough quality one on one attention and love...even with three "mommies "...

    My husband is attentive, loving to myself and our hellions...and I don't have to share him with other women. Not his time, mind, or heart...

    Those are all mine and our kids. I feel pity for these women who don't realise you truly can have it all without sharing your spouse.

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  56. The Darger family creeps me out. PJ appears to have an inflated ego, and his wives seem fake to me -- like Stepford wives. The episode didn't feel real, as in the people do not feel relatable.

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  57. The Dargers need to stay off of TV so they can maintain their "happy" family life. Seems like life is good...they pay their bills, PJ and wives can feed their children, keep a roof over their heads. They don't need TV or to tell the world.
    Stay away from the "REALITY MONSTER" Dargers.

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    1. They have big enough egos that if given the chance, they will jump on it to have their own weekly show. I'd bet good money on that !!

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  58. I know that Amanda didn't say much, but she still seemed smug to me knowing that she would be a first wife. Her mom is only a third wife in this marriage.

    And the fiance/husband was arrogant, but probably in the way Joe was arrogant at that age.

    I can't imagine accepting my daughter marrying into that bunch, especially when the Dargers have made it clear that they are independent Morman fundamentalists.

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  59. I think the Dargers are deceived as far as religion goes, but that aside, they appear to be a happy, organized, loving, normal (you know what I mean) family. Let's be honest----all kinds of "monogamous" families are in total disarray complete with selfishness, unfaithfulness, neglect, abuse, etc. all across this country. There are many wives and children that would give ANYTHING to be in a family like the Dargers---or even the Brown's for that matter. Neither family comes close to being the worst kind of family or parents that are out there. I just want to give credit where credit is due.

    However, I think their faulty religious ideas are about to bite them in their tight, toned a**es. Joe clearly was not that impressed with Amanda's choice but when you have 24 freakin kids its hard to be on top of what's going on with all of them.The fiance was arrogant and unapologetic for it. But what could Joe say? The look on Joe's face when that twit made the remark that "Amanda was the woman he wanted to be with for the rest of his life---well, the first one," was priceless! Hmmmmm.....maybe a kid marrying your daughter and already admitting he will be having sex with future "wives" isn't exactly what a good father really wants for his daughter. It isn't difficult to see that Amanda is in for big trouble. Good thing she has such a loving, supportive family to run home to when the time comes---and it WILL come!

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    1. "I think the Dargers are deceived as far as religion goes, but that aside, they appear to be a happy, organized, loving, normal (you know what I mean) family."-- Anonymous

      To be honest, no, I do not know what you mean. I raised my kids as single mom. My mom and dad helped and so did friends. It was not easy, but by the grace of God, I still know that sharing another woman's husband would not be a normal response.

      Sorry, Robyn. I'm not judging and know I do not know the burden you were under, nor the way you were raised.

      Just saying, to me one man, one woman is normal-- though, it has not worked out for me.

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    2. Why would Joe be upset about his daughter's fiance being up front about intending to shack up with other women in the future - isn't that exactly what Joe is doing?

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    3. yep - and Joe let his future father-in-laws know that he was plunging straight into polygamy by marrying their daughter PLUS her cousin in the same wedding ceremony! lol So, Joe gets just a small taste now of his own arrogance and smugness from this kid.

      It didn't set well with me that Joe said he's sure that Alina's dad thought, "oh , you just think you can get by on your good looks . . ." ugh. what an arrogant statement to put into someone's mouth. especially when you weren't even good looking.

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  60. Pamela Springville, Utah


    Sorry, but thinking the Dargers are even close to being a family one would strive to be is a joke. Yes cheating, abuse, and problems lie in every family. However, being a part of a plig family is lacking in every way. Tell me one positive thing about being a wife or bringing your kids up in that nightmare.

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    1. I'm with you. Even tho monogamy has its challenges, I do see tons of happy couples w/well-adjusted kids. I've yet to see that in polygamy. NOPE- Dargers don't impress me much - other than their organizational skills. But I don't like how overly controlling Joe is (apparently HAS to be otherwise it's Brown Clown 3-Ring Circus Chaos) to the point that he also requires his youngsters (iirc it's around the age of 11 or 12) to work in their business and start paying their share of rent. blech I won't even START on the weirdness vibe that's not hard to pick up between the women and competing for him in their outward PDA's. and his smugness. and arrogant ego. and the kids that aren't allowed to really voice their feelings about it all.

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  61. Here is a question for everybody (btw, I'm first time poster, long time reader):

    If one of the Kodettes decided to pursue a relationship with PJ, which one of them would be? and what do you think both families will react to the event??

    Just a thought!

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    1. Robyn's the true opportunist of the bunch and so she'd step up to it in a heartbeat IF PJ would only have her. No, he wouldn't even tho she's the only one who comes close to his "body type" for women. STILL, he's seen how manipulative and what a liar she is PLUS she's lazy, feels entitled and isn't very bright. So, she's a no-go for him. I honestly don't see him adding to his harem - unlike i see Kody doing up the road. Shortly.

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  62. For whatever reason, my REPLY button isnt working so I'm responding here to the above discusssion about other women and children giving anything to be in the Darger or Brown family. I'm a social worker. I've been in this profession for MANY, MANY years in three different states. I can attest to the truth of that statement. There ARE many women and children that would give ANYTHING to have been raised in either one of those homes. I'm NOT saying those are ideal or even right. I personally believe that one mom and one dad in a long-term monogamous faithful relationship is the best for kids. But neither the Brown nor the Darger kids know what true abuse--in all its form is. And lucky for them. There is all kind of crazy out there---and I've seen alot of it and let me tell you the D and B kids are fortunate in many ways.

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  63. first time poster :)
    Didnt know where to post as the "Houses: part deux" comment area was full, but has anyone else that has figured out where the new homes are find the real estate listing for one of them and see that it shows a picture of the WET BAR?? LOL

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  64. I'm late, but there's a sidenote that I wanted to add:
    "The one that moved out" from here http://sisterwivesblog.blogspot.com/2011/11/our-america-with-lisa-ling-modern_616.html is the sister of the young groom in this (Robert's sister) who marries Amanda Darger.

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  65. I enjoyed learning about the Darger family. They seem like such very loving and committed people. I was left with many questions though. (1) Marrying two women on the same day- how did you organize the honeymoon/s? (2) How did you decide which of the two to marry first? (3) What do Valerie's children call Joe? I heard the mention of Papa Joe. But, being their Uncle first, I was wondering how that worked.

    God bless your family...

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  66. I enjoy the show very interesting thow I couldnt share my husband but the women seen to love each other and there husband. Is there going to be more showes? I enjoy Watching My three wifes,Sister Wifes and 19 kids and counting. I have eight childern and it is interesting how family struture works in big family.

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