Review "Sister Wives" "Tell All" s04e11

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Tamron Hall pledged viewers hard hitting questions and a behind the scenes look at the Browns. Hard hitting? More like nerf ball and pillow fights. Made the behind the scene posts at SWB look smokin' hot! First question up was about getting the McMansions. Promptly for me the volume drifted down and I got fixated on things like the fact Meri has had her tooth fixed or how many baby doll ruffle tops do they own all together. You know the hard hitting stuff. Meri, Tamron's fav, jump started next season's storyline by saying jealousy could be the problem in paradise. She also informs us that Mariah is going out of state for college. Guess that big issue wasn't really an issue after all since this was obviously taped long ago.
                                                                                         
The group is still chewing the cud

of covetousness when BAM! Out of nowhere, Robyn gives me a little gem. Make this gem#3. I bet in 6 months we never never see this happen again. Bored with her cud chewing, she decides NOW would be a good time to get that green goo out of her eyes. Yes! We live for this! This wasn't so boring after all! She's a picking that green goo out of her eye, rollin' it

                                                                  

around in her fingers as she looks intently on her new find, then the best part..FLICKS it away. Why it was sheer genius of a good 4 seconds! I sure hope it didn't land on Kody. No wonder he didn't comfort her when she was trying to muster up those fakey tears over her loss of purr-ity for the umpteenth time! He didn't want that slimey stuff on his new jeans!
Give it UP Robyn, so you got some before you got married the first time. I can think of worse things you have done, oh like interrupt Kollene and make it about you.

She really is a scene stealer. When the talk turns to the UNLV panel discussion, she makes this brilliant declaration about those anti-polygamists. "They're not there to find answers, they are there to say you are wrong and your family needs to break apart." No, sweetie, they were there to inform the public of their stories. Not validate you or Janelle or invalidate you. Do these folks know what a panel discussion is? Even my kids were asking the same question.

How unfair it was that in the first few seconds of the show they flash a scene of a crowd/you hear "from the public criticism"/flash to Kollene saying SW hate each other/flash to Robyn's shocked face. Shame on them for using an abused young adult to rile up shock value.

The Brown teens looked great. They are some more shining examples of our future. Smart, classy, and very articulate. Shame they seem to be brought out for the sole purpose of having their parents' back on the issues.    

      

We have watched them grow. Spunky little Maddie was the quiet one this session. When asked if she was going into polygamy, Aspyn discussed studying her parents religion to decide what she believed, which was a wonderful moment of Fundamental Mormon clarity. So, for the young adults, a little childhood reminder: "You’re off to great places, today is your day!" "You're mountain is waiting, so get on your way!" - Dr. Seuss

 

I've mellowed a tad toward Meri upon hearing her praise from Kollene. She seemed to be the go-to lady for our interviewer, and did a fairly good job. Meri wins the best makeup and hair award from SWB. Baby issue? No I'm not going there. Not feeling like beating a dead horse today. What's the holdup? Everett McGill said it best. 'Cause you know,"It's a fool that looks for logic in the chambers of a human heart."

 Janelle looked great. But she is reminding me more and more of a robotic mentality. Validate..Invalidate..Monogamy ..Polygamy..I wouldn't be surprised if she started moving like the robot from "Lost in Space" shouting "Danger Will Robertson!" Janelle always appears very nice. I think she's in love with the man and somehow has a way of compartmentalizing the crazy that goes with living in "the lifestyle." We thinks she looks great and enjoy watching her weight loss transformation. For that, we tip our hat to Janelle. 

Christine drank the grape kool-aid long ago and it's showing, sweetheart. Curiosity is a sign of intelligence, but to Christine that seems to make Mykelti a wild child. Do you think the voices she hears inside her head are fearing there's something out there, out there that just might be normal and fulfilling?
Christine is still hopped up at Aunt Kristyn during the "Tell All." Real reason you ask? Well, the Browns are living illegally. They want polygamy decriminalized. Kristyn wants to stop polygamy from becoming legal. But you won't hear the Browns say the facts. They simply are on opposite sides. This is not a personal attack. Not on Kristyn Decker's side, anyway.

 Kody. What do I have to say about Kody? I'll just let him speak for himself.

Twisted Sister saw Kody in a different light.

                                                                                          

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Real Housewives of Atlanta - Kody Brown Style

Ever wonder how Kody would hold up with the Real Housewives of Atlanta as his Plural family? Let’s take a look….

Kody: "LOVE should be MULTIPLIED, not DIVIDED."

Candy:  “No, its MONEY should be Multiplied, not Divided.”

Cynthia:  “What he’s dividing up sure ain’t worth it child.”

Phaedra:  “Hmm…, might be interesting, but I am a southern lady, not a Mormon one honey.”

Kim:  “Hell ya! I’ve done that before, long as the pay is good!”

NeNe:  (Making gagging face) “That boy is going to make me puke! Sicko! Close your legs to married men!”

Kody: “I feel like a boy toy!”

Candy:  “Well first you put in the sugar and make it sticky….”

Cynthia:  “So not in this conversation, his ‘boy’ is about as big as a ‘toy’.”

Phaedra:  “But the powdered sugar makes it sweet!”

Kim:  "Shut the front door!" "And the back one!"

NeNe:  “Listen, I’d never put Kool-Aid, candied yams, peppermint candy, SHUT UP!!! THAT IS SO STUPID”!

Kody: I’m 'proselyting' my dogma: “The more kids the bigger the planet, the greater the king I will be!.”

Candy:  "Say Whhhaaat?"

Cynthia: "I’d rather take my chances then follow that boy.”

Phaedra:  “Venus and Mars honey, Venus and Mars.”

Kim:  “What in the F$#% is a Dogma?”

NeNe:  (To Kim) “He’s talking about you on a good day, BI%^&!”

KODY: "He's a brother from another mother and she's a sister from the same mister"

Candy:  “And who ain’t in Atlanta?”

Cynthia:  “And you are not get another mother with a dang blister, that’s all I’m saying.”

Phaedra:  “Every saint has a past and ever sinner a future.”

Kim:  “Well that ring didn’t mean a thing!”

NeeNee:  “Oooh, squeezing my Hello Kitty SHUT!”

Kody: Where’s Mare, my lover?

Candy:  “I think you put her out to pasture long ago.”

Cynthia:  “Galloping far away if she’s smart!” "She's leading by a chin."

Phaedra:  “You mean the one with a bathing suit on that looks like a pretzel dipped in cottage cheese?”

Kim:  “B$T%^ is over at my house trying to steal my Versace China!” 

NeNe:  “Don’t you mean your project manager?”

Kody: "Hey NeNe, do you want to give your leftover house money to Kim?"

Candy:  “Glad I got my own empire, and a pre-nup.”

Cynthia:  “This should be gooooddd child, yes NeNe, do you?”

Phaedra:  “Oh lawd, I’m taking something that takes the edge off before I scream or poop on myself”!

Kim:  “Hell ya!”

NeNe:  “I’ll snap your neck and make your eyeballs pop out, I ain’t playin! When you was running your mouth, I was running to the bank! SHUT UP! You take your finite resources and put them where the sun don’t shine! I’m the rich, bitch!!Bloop bloop!”

"To me, dating a divorced woman had an ICK factor"

Candy:  “Well, dating you made me make toys if you get my drift.”

Cynthia:  “Don’t you mean cold-sore factor?”

Phaedra:  “Well I wanted a CLEAN man!”

Kim:  “Oh hell, what’s next, world peace?”

NeNe:  “You can take your Keep Sweet, Validate, lifestyle, autonomy, Plural, raggidity ass right back to Yoming, you ghetto fool. Watch out, you’ll end up in the ocean.”

Kody: "I got a bomb I am dropping today: I PICKED THE DRESS!"

Candy:  "Are we sure he isn’t wearing the dress?”

Cynthia:  “And it shows, that’s all I’m saying’”

Phaedra:  “Now why would a proper southern man want to pick out a dress?”  

Kim:  “Mine was better B$%$^.’

NeNe:  “And she’s got a whole lot up in that dress, a dead poppa, wigs, Victoria’s Secret, Std’s, grifters,  bills,  Ora-gel,  plans to marry up, Who knows what else?”  “Oh and serendipity and buzz!”

Kody: "I NEED to be obeyed!"

Candy:  “Me and mom don’t play, you hear me!”

Cynthia:  “That boy is barking up the wrong trees.” 

Phaedra:  “Why do these other women cry over such a rude man?”

Kim:  (pointing to boobs) “My girls don’t obey anyone in the poorhouse!”

NeeNee:  “Don’t let the door hit ya where the good lord split ya~! THAT IS SO STUPID, SHUT UP, BLOOP BLOOP! How many times do I have to tell your dumb ass this?”

Shout out to Caramel Brownie for her great picture above!!

 

Now your turn…. Let’s hear your Atlanta Housewives/Kody conversations!

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Please, will someone hire a STYLIST for these people? Kody's wearing that brown jacket again! And what was Christine thinking with that animal print?

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