Oh My Gosh, What Were They Thinking?

Photo courtesy Las Vegas Sun

We all know that the Browns are in desperate need of makeovers, right?

But good gravy, don't these yokels own  ANY nice slacks, suits, dresses ANYTHING THAT ISN'T WORN and WRINKLED???? And Meri already wore that horrible sweater and blouse before. I'm positive the steerage passengers on the Titanic dressed better. I KNOW First and Second Class passengers did. SHOW SOME RESPECT for yourselves! DRESS UP SOMETIMES!!

I'm going to be perfectly honest. The last time I wore such worn out jeans, my boss ( a very nice woman) took me aside and asked me to go home immediately and rethink my attire. And that was a non customer facing job, by the way.
 
That was over 35 years ago. I never wore jeans like Meri's to work again.

Now, I know the Meri and Kody were at the Titanic Exhibit, but damn Meri, you didn't have a better pair of jeans to wear?

And Kody, do you have to look like you just rolled out of bed? Surely, someone owns an iron and a mirror?

These two are an embarrassment to reality show 'stars' around the planet! They just DON'T get it do they? I guess dress for success was never a factor in their business plan.

But if you're posing for pictures on the red carpet, or anywhere out in public, damn it, DRESS THE PART!!

Thanks to Caramel Brownie and others who feel the Browns need a stylist - NOW.

UPDATE!!: I Scour the Internet: Rainy Days and Mondays Edition 4/23/12

What a fun weekend it's been!

What a rare mood I'm in!

Why it's almost like time for I Scour the Internet!

Yes, reading the Brown twits tweets have definitely put me in a rare mood, so I thought I'd showcase my songwriting abilities. Of course, I'm not as good as Robyn's little girl, but then I don't have Baby Sol's monkey ears to inspire me.

But let's save that for later, shall we?

When we last saw the twitterlings from the Browns, Robyn was screaming her lungs out on the NY NY roller coaster. Not to be outdone, Meri also tweeted her 'delight' of riding the 'coaster with Robyn.

Hmmmm....I don't know how to interpret the 'begging for quarters'. Is this an inside joke betwixt the Brown Sister Wives Super Duo, or is Meri subconsciously lamenting how awful riding a rollercoaster with Robyn truly is? I'm going with the latter.

Hey Robyn, cheer up! At least Meri didn't say it was almost as much fun as getting a root canal!

Somebody had a birthday! Somebody had a birthday!



When you have a family as huge as the Browns, someone is either having a birthday or aniversary or whatever. What makes the Browns unique is how they choose to tweet about it.

Sometimes they go overboard with the tweets, then other times they are strangely silent. Sometimes, I feel like I'm in the Twilight Zone, but that's another story altogether...

 But one thing for sure, this is one BAD picture of Robyn YIKES!!!

Okay, back on topic. Christine had a BIRTHDAY last week !!!

I <3 yer guts, Kody? I <3 YER GUTS????!!!???? Kody, I swear your 10 year old children are more mature than you! That is just so JUVENILE! Here's this woman who has borne six (6) children for you, and the best you can come up with is ' I <3 YER GUTS'???? Good Grief!! How embarrassing for Christine!

I don't understand why, but I feel sorry for Christine. She is just so appreciative of the minuscule scraps of attention Kody throws her way. But leave it for someone to make sure SHE is the focus of attention...even on Christine's Birthday...

It doesn't take a rocket scientist to figure out Robyn's creepy little game here. Even if Robyn's daughter did come up with the Sol ditty, couldn't it have waited until the next day (or maybe even NEVER)  to be tweeted? But no, Robyn appeared to be compelled to make sure her little Sol is always foremost in fans minds. Sad, isn't it?

And somebody had an anniversary!!

What a difference a few days and a different Sister Wife can make. Notice how Kody expresses his love...

A simple I<3 U. No 'yer guts', just a simple I <3 U. How very telling, makes me wonder what Kody will say when Robyn's anniversary rolls around. It should be soon...

I'm telling y'all. There is so much going on between the lines in the Browns tweets, they really should just give up on twitter. Meri has asserted her position as THE love of Kody's life in this tweet. She was the first to be married - in fact, she's been married for 22 years! She makes sure everyone knows she's the first wife, how long, and that Kody is her LOVER, now and FOREVER.

But then she goes all high school with that immature what ice cream describes your marriage BS. Frankly, if you're a practicing polygamist, I would think which ice cream flavor best describes your marriage would be the very last thing on the your list of things people should know.

Trust me, all it does is open you and your family up for ridicule. For example, I went searching through the internet for ice cream flavors that best describes Kody. I came up with Ben and Jerry's....

CHUBBY HUBBY

My runner up flavor was Jamaican Me Crazy.  I think you see my point! DUMB!

As the season premiere looms closer and closer, we see a surprising (at least for me) tweet from Christine...

Say whut??? There's a Brown still going for their Real Estate License, and it's Christine? Unbelievable. I am totally gobsmacked. Who would've thunk that Christine would be the one actually having a goal over and above shilling that Operation Upchuck stuff? To actually be thinking and planning for the future. Real estate business may stink right now, but its got no place to go but UP.

Now, this can mean three things: Either this is a story line for this season on the show, or ... maybe she's making sure she has some kind of job skill when the TLC gravy train stops, or ... she's had enough of the Kody Road Show and will need a job when she's on her own.

What do y'all think???

EXTRA      EXTRA      EXTRA    EXTRA    EXTRA    EXTRA   

UPDATE 4/24/12

Looks like the Browns threw a surprise birthday party for Christine Monday night. I guess to ensure the surprise factor, they decided to have the party five days after the fact. What a novel idea, got to write that one down...NOT! Let's just hope last night wasn't Christine's night with Kody.

Anyway, here's what Christine's had to say...

Well that's all for now, and remember... I Scour the Internet, so YOU don't have to !!!

I Scour the Internet: The Post Tax Day Edition 4/18/12

Seems since the new season has been officially announced, the Browns have been making their obligatory 'celebrity' red carpet appearances around Las Vegas town.

But first....

Okay, I'm not even going to beat around the bush with this one. Why are Kody's and Robyn's twitter pictures the same? Why are the other 3 wive's pictures different? Does this mean Robyn's main project is the book (coming out May 1st, but available for pre-order now)?  Or is there a more sinister reason lurking in the shadows?

So, what's the deal?  WE WANT TO KNOW!

While we wait for an answer, (and from past experience with this krew, we are in for a looooooong wait) let's take a look at the TLC Facebook fanpage.

Betcha' TLC is SOOO happy the Browns had to move to Las Vegas to avoid the big bad Sheriff from slamming old balding Kody into the slammer and throwing away the key. Can you imagine the cost of transporting the adult Browns from Lehi each weekend just so they could get their rather plump visages in the entertainment news photo pages each week?

Well, the transportation costs are probably less than the rent of four moderate sized homes in Vegas, but that's not the point, OK?

Anyway, May is going to be a busy month: Book comes out on May 1st, new season of Sister Wives starts on May 13th, and their next court date is set for May 16th. What's a network to do?

The TLC sponsored Sister Wives Facebook fanpage has asked fans to submit a question for the Browns. And if luck is indeed a lady, a fan might have the opportunity to appear on the show!

So I quickly scanned through the over 900 entries. Here's a short sample - I paraphrased to protect the guilty...

1. I wanna be a sister wife!
2. When are you coming back on TV?
3. Is Kody interested in a 5th wife? Sign me up!
4. I love your show!
5. Kody, how do you keep healthy having sex with four different women each week?
6. Kody do you use condoms?
7. How come Kody can have many wives but the wives are limited to one husband?
8. Why haven't the wives lost any weight?
9. To the wives: How can you have sex with a guy who you know is sticking it to three other Koochies on a regular basis? (OK, that was a direct quote)

 and so on....
This person decided it was appropriate to ask questions to the writer of a comment they didn't like:

To [name deleted] What's the difference ? Are you a virgin? Have you not cheated on your husband? So what's the difference? Polygamy is the best situation and much better than getting caught lying and cheating which a majority of us have been through at least once. Oh yeah, I love the Browns!

Alrighty then. Good luck TLC! If you have a need to laugh, here's the facebook link: https://www.facebook.com/home.php#!/sisterwives


Now let's take a look at the Brown's tweets.


If you remember from the first season, Truely was Kody's thirteenth child, and was born appropriately enough on the 13th day of April. Too bad Christine was the only adult to tweet about her baby's milestone 2 year birthday.

Meri seemed to be more concerned with bargains at the green grocer:

and  anticipating the Dancing With the Stars Live show...

Later that weekend, Robyn had her head in the clouds on a rollercoaster ride:

And Janelle also twitted about the DWTS show she attended:

Oh yeah, Janelle tweeted to Rosie O' about the Mike Tyson Show they all attended, but it doesn't look like Rosie responded publicly. I also wonder, since Rosie was in town, if she and the Sister Wives got together. Guess we'll have to wait to see if that encounter was filmed for the show.

Now to be fair <cough cough>, Aspyn did post Happy Birthday greetings to her little sister as well as photos of her birthday party. And, lo and behold, guess who was front and center with little Truely on his lap, enjoying the festivities? Pssstt....he's wearing a shiny purple shirt and looks like an aged surfer dude with a receding hairline. At least he isn't holding back the strands of hair left on his head with sunglasses. But he does have  definite comb over action in play.

So that's all for now. And remember: I Scour the Internet so YOU don't have to...worry about it!

LVRJ: Summerlin serves as backdrop, home for reality shows and stars

Here's an article from the Las Vegas Review-Journal finally making it to online. Notice the huge bottle of that Skinney OpDetox stuff that Kody is carrying. Gee, I wonder what business meeting that was...at the public library no less?


By Jan Hogan
VIEW STAFF WRITER
Posted: Apr. 17, 2012 | 12:20 a.m.

Fess up. Have you ever wondered what it would be like to be a reality TV star? Some of them live in Summerlin....

YOU MIGHT SEE THE 'SISTER WIVES' AROUND TOWN

Meri Brown is on the TLC reality show "Sister Wives," which details her life as one of Kody Brown's four wives. The Browns relocated from Utah to the Summerlin area, and she said her life has gotten incredibly busy due to the demands of the show and fans who will whip out cellphones and ask to have their photo taken with her.

"It happens quite often," she said. "But it's really funny to me because I still look at myself as just a normal person. I don't think of myself as a celebrity. So it's, I don't know, I'm just a person, so it's funny that people are so starstruck."

She said people stare at her wherever she goes, whispering to friends behind their hands. It's a reaction she and a girlfriend found funny when they took their kids to Disneyland earlier this year.

Does she feel she always has to be on her best behavior?

"I should be on my best behavior all the time, anyway," she said and laughed. "I still blow my nose if I need to blow my nose in public."

She said she was never one to leave the house, let alone her bedroom, without her hair and makeup already done, even as a teenager. So, that hasn't changed. What has changed since she was in high school is that she has more friends.

"I was kind of a nerd as a teenager," Brown said. "I had the big '80s glasses and the braces, and I had a friend who (told) me that her baby sister was afraid of me because I looked like an alien."

She amended the "nerd" comment and said, "In reality, it's more that I have always been really shy. It has always been hard for me to be open to people I didn't know. In the past eight or 10 years, I've been working on coming out of my shell. But it hasn't been until our show came out and our family went public that I have really had to overcome that. It has definitely been an opportunity for my personal growth and development."

Brown credited the show with aiding other people's personal growth, as well, and said it has "opened people's minds" about the polygamist lifestyle.

SUMMERLIN-AREA BUSINESSES CAN ALSO BE SEEN ON TV

Just as people appear on reality TV, places in Summerlin have been highlighted, as well.

Chad Sumida is the manager of Menchie's Frozen Yogurt, 7500 W. Lake Mead Blvd., Suite 2. The children of "Sister Wives" were filmed there before going ice skating in the SoBe Ice Arena at the Fiesta Rancho.

"I know a lot of people are really into the show, so I was very excited when they called ... I don't know how many businesses he could have gone to, but he chose mine," Sumida said.

The producer outlined how shooting would work. He asked that no one stare at them, just act the way they normally would and not pay attention to the youngsters. The production did not restrict how many people came in during filming or disrupt normal operations much. Sumida opted not to be on TV. To celebrate, he did not charge any patrons who came in that day.

The show aired last November, and he made sure he caught the episode on TV.

"I was, like, super excited," he said. " 'Oh, man, that's my store.' It was our little 15 minutes of fame. They cut a lot, though. They were shooting for a couple hours, but it was just a five-minute clip when it aired."..................


Here's the url for the entire article if you want to read about the other 'celebrities' of Summerlin.
http://www.lvrj.com/view/summerlin-serves-as-backdrop-home-for-reality-shows-and-stars-147704665.html?ref=665

UPDATE! RadarOnline: Kody Brown Takes His Sister Wives To Las Vegas Ahead Of New Season

Created 04/14/2012 - 9:22pm

By Radar Staff

Just because they have 17 children to look after between them doesn’t mean Kody Brown and his Sister Wives can’t enjoy a night out.

The polygamist reality star was out in Las Vegas Friday night with three of his wives; Meri, Janelle and Christine.

Fourth wife Robyn seemed to have stayed away from the night out after giving birth six months ago.

The large family now lives in Sin City after moving from Utah.

Last night, Kody took in Mike Tyson’s new one-man show, Mike Tyson: Undisputed Truth – Live on Stage at the MGM Grand and also joined the girls at the Dancing With The Stars live show at the Tropicana Hotel where they looked quite the cozy foursome.

As RadarOnline.com previously reported, Kody and his wives recently won a legal battle against Utah County prosecutors allowing their lawsuit to challenge the bigamy law to go forward.

Season 4 of Sister Wives will be returning to TLC on May 13.

http://www.radaronline.com/exclusives/2012/04/polygamist-kody-brown-sister-wives-las-vegas
======================================================================


Oh my gosh! Looks like Janelle and Christine are the same size now. Meri does appear to be thinner; maybe her swim regimen is working out for her.

Kody just looks like Kody...and very thick around the middle, too. Any speculations why Robyn did not join this funfest? Raise your hand if you think she's pregnant.

==============================================

Found another picture (courtesy Getty Images) from 4/14/12!

Kody and Krew (including Robyn this time) attended the grand opening of Mike Tyson:Undisputed Truth. More flattering picture than the DWTS premiere the night before, and I really like Janelle's top. Kody looks like he's auditioning for the Rat Pack - forty years and forty pounds too late with a shiny shirt and black t-shirt combo.  That strange sound you hear has got to be Dean, Sammy, Peter and Frank collectively yelling HELL NO while furiously rolling over!

Oh no, another angle (courtesy hollywoodonline.com and Getty Images) and Kody's not so svelte body is more apparent (he must have exhaled). Kody, Meri and Robyn need help from a professional STYLIST, NOW. Kody looks like a bobble head with a potbelly. Kudos to Christine for resisting the urge to button up her sweater.

I Scour the Internet: The Ho-Hum Edition 4/10/12

Now, we all know that the Browns are not the most exciting people on this planet. C'mon, fess up. Unless you are one of those diehard fans still... STILL... tweeting for the date the new season starts, reading a Kody Brown and his Sister Wives tweets can be dangerous, especially if you are driving or operating heavy equipment.

Boring...BORING...B O R I N G

But my job is to scour the internet, so I have traveled to the darkest corners of Facebook and Twitter to bring you...The Best of Kody Brown and Wives. <<Shudder>>
First up, the Kody Brown Facebook Fanpages. I'm gonna try to make this as painless as possible, so I will be giving you a synopsis of what I've read, and maybe a link if you're lucky.

Here's a highlight of what I saw on the The Official Vetted Friends Only and Utterly Sickening Display of Adults Who Fantasize about Sister Wives and Even Want to Be a Sister Wife Someday (yeah, I'm talking about YOU, Jackie!) Brown Family Fanpage.
The Admins (you know, the personal friends of the family) wished everyone a Happy Easter and Passover...then mentioned they had a migraine, a sick child and how hard it was to get on the computer.

Excuses...Excuses...Excuses...

Janelle mentioned how wonderful it has been to have Passover and Easter together this year. Amazingly, only one fan wrote a comment in response. Hm........

And I don't see any other wives taking the time to comment on the Friend Facebook page. Strange, isn't it?

Bored, I ventured over to the Like Facebook fanpage.

This fanpage has been changed to the Timeline format. There's this totally obnoxiously HUGE picture of the Brown's book (coming out May 1st - don't forget to pre-order!), and the comments are buried somewhat in the body of the timeline.

One thing however, caught my eagle eye. Kody's favorite restaurant, Michcoancan Gourmet Mexican Restaurant left a comment on 4/9/12. Since only part of the comment was visible, I eagerly clicked on the restaurant's link.

Holy Guacamole, I hit Sisterwives paydirt!  The full comment said:

Sister Wives cast and film crew enjoyed lunch today on our patio. What a nice day...88 degrees with a slight breeze...All we need is the ocean view!

And there was a picture! Now, I'm not going to post the picture here, but I will describe it. Seated outside on a patio, Kody is at the head of the table, with clear shots of Christine and Janelle to Kody's left. The people on his right are obscured by the film crew. Janelle's girth does not look any smaller.

But what is SO surprising, is this comment made presumably by the Restaurant  also on 4/9/12 at 7:38 am (that morning):

Filming at Michoacan Gourmet Mexican Restaurant at 11:30am today!!

With an accompanying link to the TLC Sister Wives website so the reader can quickly discern who was being filmed.

I wonder whose idea THAT was? The restaurant owner? Kody Brown? Delving a little further, I found a comment from the restaurant posted on 3/15/12 with a picture of Meri and Kody:

Many of you have asked when Kody Brown/Sister Wives will be back at the restaurant. He and Meri will be dining with us at 8:30 tonight and said "Sure, put it on Facebook!"

'Nuff said...

Oh yes, a famous Oscar winning actor also had lunch at Michoacan a week ago. He declined having his picture taken, for privacy reasons.

So is the production company still filming for the season coming up? Will this scene even make the show or wind up on the cutting room floor? And who were the other people at the table with Kody? Guess we'll have to wait and see...

Here's a link to the Facebook page: https://www.facebook.com/MichoacanLV

Okay, it's time for the Twitter Tweets.

Seems Aspyn again is out of town, this time in Idaho for the Easter weekend. Christine's public twitter activity was to RT a tweet from her bonus child, Mariah:

Interesting... is it me or does it seem Sister Wives are hopeless romantics, who either live vicariously through movies, or want to extend their honeymoon experience forever?  Back to movies, let me see, what is my favorite movie kiss? Wow, the only thing that comes to mind is  not a kiss - it's Nicolas Cage eating a cockroach in a  movie he made. Yep, he sure did. Guess I wouldn't make a good Sister Wife.

Oh dear, I wonder if Super Sol <choke> sleeps between Kody and Robyn on a regular basis. Sounds like Robyn kinda melancholy - I wonder if she's PREGGERS? I just had a mental picture of Robyn  lying with Sol in his baby crib. Hey, if Kyle Richards from RHOBH can do it with her daughter, why not Robyn? However, there is absolutely NO comparison between Kyle's hubby Mauricio Urbansky and Kody Brown! Mauricio is much better looking and has a J.O.B!

Moving along quickly, let's check out what Meri's been doing...

I can't imagine willingly swimming for two hours. The only time I would swim that much would be if I had fallen overboard from a cruise ship and had to swim two hours to reach shore...maybe...And let's hope this swim marathon was in an olympic sized pool and not the typical backyard one.

So, Meri swims, Robyn snuggles with her infant son, and Christine rates movie kisses. Is there anything (outside of Meri's and Robyn's lunch together which was most likely filmed) these Sister Wives do together?

So that's all for now. And remember, I Scour the Internet, so you don't have to !

I Scour the Internet: The Sister Wives New Season Starts May 13th Edition

I hate to be a Debby Downer, but what's up with the Sister Wives and Krew?

For weeks, both Facebook fanpages and Brown Family Twitters have been overrun with fans asking "When is Sister Wives coming back?" The response from the Krew? CHECK with TLC. What??!!

If I had a reality show, I'd want my fans know as soon as possible when the next season starts. ISN'T THAT THE PURPOSE OF TWITTER AND FACEBOOK?

Where's the enthusiasm? Where's the love?

The Browns, for some unknown extremely quirky reason, have left the announcement totally at the whim of their network masters. And sneaky masters at that - Can you see when the season starts? This is from TLC's facebook, and appeared March 30th, approx.

Maybe I'm over-reacting, but I'm just not feeling the love between this network and the Browns. At least the Krew at the Friend Only Fanpage haven't blame this situation on that pesty 'mole' from last year...yet...

Maybe the Browns are tired of the intrusion into their lives. Who knows. But it sure seems like something happened and the Browns seem obliged to only announce when their book goes on sale, or the next Kody and his Family's (ha!) next Operaccion Repo Depot Boxtop (exact location by email invitation only) gigs. And don't forget the restaurant shout outs, and Robyn's 'Buy the Darger's book while waiting for our book to be released on May 1st!'.

Oh yes, before I forget, the Browns family website is finally up and running. All I have to say is, if this is ANY indication of the quality of writing to be shown in the Book, save your money! And I wish I had a dollar for every instance the word 'We' was used.

Here's the url for the curious: http://www.kodybrownfamily.com/. Hmmm....wonder why there's nothing about the show coming back on May 13th?


So, what else is out there in the Brown's tweety land?

Good Gracious, Kody. I applaud your mentioning Truely in a tweet, but why did you have to ruin the moment by saying she needs to grow more so Sol can feel secure? Oh yeah, gotta advertise that book, right?

Okey, Dokey...Makes me wonder how many times Kody helped getting the kids ready for school....hmmmm....

You know, the Browns are a depressing bunch. I need something to cheer me up, to make me smile! Please, please somebody???

THANK YOU, MERI!!  Now I have this urge to shop at Bed Bath and Beyond, and to hell with the cost! Oh yeah, BBB wants you to know the checque's in the mail, enjoy!

Well folks, as my brother husband Popeye would say - 'that's all I can stands cuz I can't stands no more!'

And remember, I scour the Internet so you don't have to!