Polygamy Today with Ed Kociela, author, newspaper,and writer.

Rebecca Kimbel interviews Ed Kociela, who explains Warren Jeff's powerful hold on his followers and the injustices he demands of them by way of the telephone in his prison cell. Obedient, his followers remain prisoners of the mind and accept the destruction of their families and their capacity to choose for themselves they remain enslaved in polygamy.

"Sister Wives" What would writer Ed Kociela's "Tell All" Questions Be?

                                                                  Kody's example of journalism.

Tamron Hall has been in the TV business for some time now. The 43-year-old reporter, who has a journalism degree from Temple University, was a fill-in for Keith Olbermann on MSNBC and does primary fill-in work for Natalie Morales on NBC’s “Today” show. In other words, she’s been around the block a time or two, which is why I was very surprised to see her turn up as the resident “journalist” on Sunday night’s episode of “Sister Wives.”

On the surface, her job was to interview Kody Brown, his wife, and his mistresses. What viewers got was what we, in the business, would call, a “softball” interview where the questions are weak, lack depth, and are not not terribly informative.

I got this..Ed won't get me...huckle huckle

I would love to do a one-on-one interview with Kody Brown.
What would I ask?

Why do you position yourself away from the AUB?

Do you pay tithing to the AUB?
Why do you insist this is a “lifestyle” choice and
not a religious choice? If this is a lifestyle choice, 
then it is solely about the sex and not your salvation. 
If it is about salvation, why do we not hear that and
why and how that works? Or, do you even have religious
beliefs? What is it all about?

Whose names are on the birth certificates of your children?
What is your combined income and how can you afford four homes on a cul de sac in the greater Las Vegas metropolitan area?
Have you and your wife ever asked a teen girl out on a date?
Why do you think you are “safer” from prosecution in Nevada than Utah, where the previous and current Attorney General have proclaimed that they will not prosecute violations of the state’s bigamy/polygamy statutes?
Who performed the ceremonies at your spiritual weddings?
That’s just for starters.

But, those questions will never be asked on a TLC broadcast because the network is too heavily invested in the show. Instead, we witnessed a very poor example of what was purported to be a journalistic interview, positioning a woman with a resume from a major network that has been in business far longer and has far more credibility than TLC, as a representative of the people who would like to know more about Kody, his wife, and the other women in his life.

There was one moment, and one moment only, that went beyond the superficial, and that was when it was mentioned that Kody and Robyn were still in the “honeymoon” phase of their relationship.
If you watched closely, you could see a flash of pain in the faces of a couple of the women, and rightfully so. Kody? He had that big, ear-to-ear grin that makes me want to toss a brick through the TV screen.  

 

I'll charm him with my humor....

It was, in my mind, the most telling moment I have seen on “Sister Wives,” affirmation that this is not about religion or a lifestyle choice, that this is simply a practice of gratification of Kody’s need to sleep with a bunch of women and not get any grief about it.

Look, if it’s purely about the sex, just be open about it. If it is purely a lifestyle choice, be up front, but don’t lay all that business of purity and righteousness on us or the self-proclaimed persecution. Rock stars do it guiltlessly all the time. Just say you don’t believe in monogamy and be done with the other stuff.

But that won’t happen because, as evidenced by the shoddy “reporting” on the last episode, TLC has a product that it needs to buff and shine and maintain a positive image for to hold on to viewers and propagate new ones.

                                                       Ladies taking off their rose colored glasses.

The questions will always be sanitized, the events that take place on the show will always have a little help or urging from the producers, Kody and the women will always be painted as the victims in this little play.

Since being invited here by Mister Sister, I have studied the posts, the questions, the thoughts of the community that gathers here. Guess what? There are some very articulate people here who are looking for some answers, who are very confused by what they see on this show, who are a hell of a lot brighter than the producers and the TLC network give them credit for as they strive for bigger ratings.

I hate to take such a serious tone because there is a liveliness, a sense of humor here, and I certainly don’t want to be the buzz killer. But, I also know the incredible power of the media, the strength it possesses, the influence it can sway.

                                 Man, this Ed guy is not B.S.ing around! I'm outta here! Starts clutching chest...           


Does that mean all TV should be dour and scholarly?
Of course not. To live without humor is to live without joy.
I have used the word “context” a lot here recently because it is important to put everything into context and perspective. My context and perspective are built upon a very lengthy career as a newsman – I actually loathe the word “journalist” because it implies, by definition, something entirely different – and I hate to see what has become of a media I once defended as an honorable profession built upon an almost sacred trust between reporter and consumers of the news. We were entrusted to act in the public’s interest, on its behalf, to inform and educate, but most importantly, to be the embodiment of truth.

But, when I see how a network panders to a baser instinct of titillation rather than information, well, it breaks my heart.

Now, for a little snarky levity?
How many sister wives does it take to screw up a television network?

Written by: Ed Kociela for SWB  

"Sister Wives" Review: "Sister Wives On the Ropes" Ed Kociela

**Trying a different COMMENT way - instead of a bunch of posts, once you have read all the comments here, click the link at the bottom of this post and go directly to comment area two!  

Ed Kociela, author of 'Plygs' wrote our review this week!!!!!

BIG Love Shack, Baby Love Shack, Bay-Bee....

It’s been three days since I watched the latest episode of “Sister Wives.” I hope, in time, my stomach will stop churning. I must admit, I am not a fan of reality TV. Give me a good old-fashioned dose of “unreality” TV any day of the week, like a rerun of “Seinfeld,” or “House,” or “Everybody Loves Raymond” (thank God for DVDs!)

"The Real World?" According to whom? It certainly doesn't resemble the world I live in. And "The Apprentice?" Can't the American viewing public fire Donald Trump?

Yeah, Sunday’s episode was that bad.

It did little good for the credibility of TLC, the network that broadcasts

the show, to have it fall within 48 hours of the outstanding two-hour presentation NBC broadcast on “Dateline,” where newsman Keith Morrison explored the world of fundamental Mormon polygamy through the eyes of escaped polygamist Rebecca Musser. It was a news broadcast that lived up to the depth and integrity of a long-standing, well-respected news-gathering institution.

 

TLC, which was once known as The Learning Channel, on the other hand, is a lesson on just how far the media in the United States has slipped.

Production values for the show were minimal. The camera was unfocused, so badly that it wouldn’t even qualify as bad French noire

cinematography. The editing was sloppy, making the cut-and-pasted segments flow with all the grace of a tree branch bouncing in the current of a flash flood. The actors in this vignette were poorly equipped to carry through with the obviously scripted bits handed them by the show’s producers.

<<<Robyn caught "Chomping at the Lip" again.

And therein lies the greatest problem with the show.

I spoke with Kristyn Decker, an escapee from the shackles of polygamy

herself, about what it was like to participate in the most current episode of the show.

I gather it was akin to a cliff diver stepping off his perch only to find that the tide was out and he was doing a nose dive into the rocks.

Would Kristyn, given the opportunity or the foresight of what would occur, do it again?

“No way,” this soft-spoken refugee from one of Utah’s polygamous cults told me. “I was told we would be able to give our views, our perspectives…I feel totally betrayed.”

And that, I am ashamed to say, is how I feel about the media today. I write a weekly column for a Southern Utah newszine called

“STGnews,” but before that, I worked extensively in the media world as a newspaperman for the Herald-Examiner, once a major daily newspaper in Los Angeles, and at The Spectrum, a daily newspaper in St. George, Utah about 40 minutes from where Warren Jeffs and his FLDS bunch set up camp in the twin cities of Hildale, Utah and Colorado City, Arizona, along the border in a remote spot in the desert.

I left that behind several years ago, packed it in and hauled it down to Mexico with my wife Cara, to write my first book, a journalistic novel called “plygs.” We were gone for a year and a half. During that time, we collected our news from a variety of sources other than the local and national U.S. agencies. It was an eye-opener.

We’re here in the U.S. for the time being, doing some PR and promo work for “plygs” and my new book, “It Rocked! (Recollections of a reclusive rock critic.)” Since we’ve been back, I have been stunned by how much the media has changed. It is advertiser driven, contrived, geared more toward titillation than, well, truth.

There were moments that, as I watched, seemed totally contrived, particularly those surrounding the panel discussion held at the University of Nevada, Las Vegas facility that pitted Kody Brown and his wives against former polygamist colony members Kristyn, Kollene Snow, Willie Steed, and Christine Katas. 

The bathroom scene where Christine feigned fear of a confrontation with Kristyn just before the panel met that required sister wife

intervention to escort her from the toilet because her aunt was standing outside?

“That was ridiculous, I was just waiting to use the bathroom,” Kristyn told me. “I really needed to go to the bathroom, then fix my hair and get ready for the panel.”

She said she was really concerned, at the time, that something was wrong with her niece, Christine.

“I thought she had a (physical) problem of some kind and I really felt sorry for her,” Kristyn said.

                                                                
 Robyn giggling saving Christine

Assessment?                                           

The fear factor instilled in Christine came from the producer, not Kristyn’s presence. To have them smile and greet each other warmly would just not be good TV.  A little TLC - influenced drama spiced the scene up.

There was the moment of the episode when Robyn looked at her phone

and said somebody texted that Kody was a misogynist pig.

Sorry, the timing was just too perfect. Had it been real, wouldn’t she have mentioned who sent the text?

“They tried to make it look like one of us sent a nasty note like that,” Kristyn told me. “Then he (Kody) says the biggest adversaries in his life are the ones who left polygamy.”

To have my suspicions confirmed inflamed my sense of fairness. It also saddened my sense of loyalty to a media I have served faithfully for my entire writing career, which stretches back to when I was a 15-year-old hanging out at the offices of the small daily newspaper that served my southern California community, wanting to learn all I could about being a newsman.

The truth, as occurs so often these days, became a casualty in the pursuit of viewership and ratings. Fairness? Credibility? Out the window.

“Sister Wives” leaves us with more questions than answers.

It’s vague, misleading, especially when they get around to defining it as a lifestyle choice rather than religious mandate, but I guess as long as the group the Brown family is affiliated with gets its 10 percent tithing, everything’s OK.

                                            5th Beatle Wanna-Be or heading to "Breaking Amish?"

Me?

I’d really like to know what happens after they turn off the cameras.

I’ve seen some personality traits in Kody Brown that are alarming, his flashes of temper, his immaturity, his angry eyes, his domineering Alpha male personality. He doesn’t seem a likeable guy. At least not to me.

The women?

There doesn’t seem to be much going on behind their eyes. They always look as if they have something else they would rather say than what tumbles out of their mouths.

Are they happy?

I think Kristyn nailed it when she told me: “I used

to be there. You have to sedate your feelings with food or become a workaholic…whatever it takes to stay happy in a polygamous relationship.

“My mother taught me how to be miserably happy.”

 Sedation by bathroom affirmations?

Me?

Well, as far as reality TV goes, about all I am willing to deal with at this point is “Pawn Stars.”At least Chumlee seems to be having fun.

Thank you Ed for such a thought provoking review! 

 

TWD

Click Here to go to *Comment Area 2!!!!*

Ed Kociela - Author of "Plygs" on "Polygamy USA" Dixie State Discussion on Polygamy - and Video

**Ed is answering all questions posted tonight!!!

Today is a great day to tie in a post about "Polygamy USA" s01e06 "The New Polygamists"

Ed Kociela - Author of "Plygs" was on the show Polygamy USA after going to the discussion at Dixie State University in St. George, Utah. "Polygamist Culture and Alternative Religious Traditions" were discussed at the forum. Here's a link  Dixie Today

Remember in Polygamy USA when Marleen Barlow aka Thomson, was driving to the discussion telling us how she wanted to tell her story, and how they feared "her whole family ripped apart?" The Browns had a similar storyline...well, one good reason to watch "What Love is This" below... Ed Kociela and Doris Hanson discuss if there is a reason for fear, and why the TV stars always tell us about it....

In short, the Centennial Park ladies go to "tell the truth" about their lives in polygamy. Sorta like the Browns tonight. 

Marleen asks the crowd if they associate polygamy with Warren Jeffs or some type of abuse...I don't have a pic but UP goes Ed's hand.  Ed was the long haired cool looking guy in the audience that the camera kept going back to in the episode...and next to him is his lovely wife Cara, whom also is a poster here at SWB. The camera liked the couple and kept going back to them during the show.
 

Author Ed Kociela Questions and wife Cara observes

 Audience questions leads to Ed's "We have heard there are misconceptions but we're not told which ones they are." "We are told there is a difference between the CPark group and the FLDS." 
"What are you, where are you, and where do you stand?" Ed questions the ladies.
 

CPAC members Polly, Marlyne Hammon, Priscilla, and Maureen Thomson (Barlow)answer

Priscilla responds: "CPark people have never been a part of the FLDS.  The organized after we were out in CP already.""To say that we are an offshoot of the FLDS just isn't true and one of those misconceptions." 

Marlyne responds, "There's laws to take care of that today...it happens in monogomy...it's not polygamy that creates these type of people, it's people that created this type of people." 

___________________________________________

I contacted Ed and asked him to write a little piece about the filming. We got lucky and he did. We're lucky enough to get 2 behind the scenes views of televised debates with polygamists. BIG thanks to Ed for writing this piece and overall helping me this week, and to his wife Cara, who also has been a great support and helps me when I have blonde moments and keeps me going--- THANKS GUYS!!!
___________________________________________

FROM ED: I spent a lot of years in the media as a reporter, columnist, editor in the print field and commentator in broadcast. My blood would boil as I would hear people spit out epithets about “The Media” and its failures.

I left my last job in the newspaper business as a local news editor/columnist for one of the newspapers in the Gannett chain two years ago to write the book ‘plygs’ (http://www.amazon.com/dp/B008NRZT1M), a journalistic novel about life within a polygamous community located on the Utah-Arizona state line. My wife, Cara, and I moved to the tip of Baja California, Mexico to remove ourselves from the day-to-day lifestyle and         pressures of life in the southern Utah to allow me the comfort and distance to string together what I hope were some coherent words.

From afar, we observed the “Sister Wives” phenomena and, since our return, as we work PR and promotions for the book, “My Three Wives” and the latest entry into the world of polygamy TV, National Geographic’s “Polygamy, USA.”

After examining these shows, I have to jump the fence and agree that, well, “The Media” has let us down. You see, polygamy as practiced in the real world by Mormon fundamentalists is nothing like what is portrayed in these shows.

It is dark, perverse, criminal. And, it is eliciting support among a group of civil libertarians who argue that the government has no right to peak behind our bedroom curtains. The sad truth, however, is that the issue of polygamy is much more complex, that while individual freedoms should be guaranteed for all, they should not come at the expense of little girls who are sexually abused when forced into marriage with much older men; that it should not come at the expense of women who are coerced into a life of servitude to ensure their eternal salvation; that it should not come at the expense of young boys who are forced out of school and into the shops, work crews, and factories of the church-owned businesses; that it should not come at the expense of the taxpaying public who forks over nearly $14,000 a month in welfare benefits as the people of the community participate in the practice of “bleeding the beast,” which in simpler terms is defrauding the government to obtain money, food stamps, health care, and other government benefits that kick in the moment they write “father unknown” on their child’s birth certificate.

You won’t see that on “Sister Wives,” you won’t see that on “My Three Wives,” you won’t see that on “Polygamy, USA.” Instead, you will see a sanitized polygamous lifestyle that has little in common, other than plural marriage, with the overwhelming majority of polygamists in this country.

“Polygamy USA” takes us inside of the tiny community of Centennial Park, Ariz., where about 1,500 people who live three miles from the fundamentalist Mormons who follow Warren Jeffs, the self-proclaimed prophet of the FLDS church who is serving a sentence of life plus 20 years in a Texas prison after he was convicted of sexually assaulting two young girls—one 12, the other 14—who he took as “spiritual wives.” A dozen other men were also charged after an investigation revealed that 12 girls, between the ages of 12 and 15, had been given in “spiritual married” to much older men and that seven of them had one or more children.

The Centennial Park group, which is known as “The Work of Jesus Christ” and “The Second Ward” claims no ties to Jeffs and the FLDS after a nasty break in the 1980s over leadership, something they proclaimed loudly when we went to Dixie State University in St. George, Utah recently to listen to a group of women from the community speak.

Although we had heard about “Polygamy, USA,” we didn’t know that the National Geographic crew would be present that day, filming the women for a segment of the show. And, when I asked a question of the women, I didn’t have a clue whether it would make the show’s final cut.

I was more surprised with how the responses to my question that day were edited and was even more surprised when a spiel by one of the women about how she explained to her children, who came to her after learning of a raid on the Texas FLDS compound, that the police took all the children away because they had “more than one mommy” when the reality was that the police raided the FLDS compound because of reported sexual offenses against children.

I am concerned because these shows do little to expose the complexities of polygamy, the dark side of it, at a time when there is a serious movement to have Utah’s anti-polygamy laws overturned. We already have an attorney general who has stated that he will follow his predecessor’s policy of not prosecuting polygamy violations, we have the Kody Brown (“Sister Wives”) family suing to overturn the state’s polygamy laws, and we have some traction among a small group of people who are well-intentioned in their belief in civil liberties, but are woefully uninformed when it comes to the abuses of polygamy.

There are those who support legalization or, at least, decriminalization. However, the danger is that either step would eliminate all oversight and make the crimes against children easier to commit and closet from the public eye. Legalization or decriminalization would legitimize a culture built upon perversion and fraud. Legalization or decriminalization would continue the coercion of women into servitude under the guise of religion, depriving them of their basic human rights.

But, you won’t get that by watching “Sister Wives,” “My Three Wives,” or “Polygamy, USA.”  Damn media!

**If you haven't already, read the new book by Ed, "plygs" a journalistic novel based on historical facts that is riveting. Many have been talking about it here the past few days. We will be reviewing the book soon!

**This is another must see. Doris and Ed have such a great discussion on many facets of polygamy including the politics of, The Brown family, Polygamy USA, should polygamy be legal, well, you've got to watch it for yourself! Great show.  

Polygamy: What Love Is This? with author Ed Kociela (2 May 2013)

Author Ed Kociela has a knack for taking his readers behind closed doors. He has taken readers into the home of a family victimized by the nuclear fallout of the Cold War Era nuclear blasts at the Nevada Test Site in "Downwinders...the play," opened the doors to the frightening secrets locked away within a fundamentalist Mormon polygamous cult in "plygs," and now walks you backstage to hang out with some of the biggest stars in rock 'n' roll history in "It Rocked! (Recollections of a reclusive rock critic)." The book includes intimate looks at such musical giants as George Harrison, Mick Jagger, Bruce Springsteen, Tom Petty, The Beach Boys, Peter Frampton, KISS, Foreigner, Journey, BB King, Frank Zappa, Willie Nelson, Carlos Santana, Dick Clark, and many others who he interviewed, worked with, and got to know as a rock critic for the Los Angeles Herald-Examiner and music industry publicist.

"Plygs" is the culmination of his 16-year career as a newspaper reporter, columnist, and city editor for The Spectrum, a Gannett newspaper located in St. George, Utah, which is located about 45 minutes from the community along the Utah-Arizona state line upon which his novel is based.

 "Downwinders," was one of only three presented for a series of readings by the Utah Shakespeare Festival's "New American Playwright Series" in 2005. Kociela has also written two screenplays.

He is an acclaimed writer whose work has bridged many aspects of the media world. As a newspaperman, he won numerous awards from the Associated Press and Society of Professional Journalists. He now works as a freelance writer and weekly columnist for STGnews, an online news outlet. His career includes newspaper, magazine, and broadcast experience as a sportswriter, rock critic, news reporter, columnist, blogger, and essayist. Over the years, his work has been featured in myriad publications ranging from the Los Angeles Times and Los Angeles Herald-Examiner to US magazine and GOAL!, the magazine of the National Hockey League.

(Source: Ed Kociela, Cara Curfew-Kociela, PolygamyUSA s01e06, Polygamy: What Love Is This? with author Ed Kociela (2 May 2013))